In the morning, the party briefly discussed tactics and then headed out toward the leucrotta cave. About three hours into the trip, they encountered a "person of the sky" (four-armed winged humanoids with a striking resemblance to gargoyles, unless you notice that they breathe and their skin is more leathery than stony) flying along with a blue egg. He said it was a dragon egg (Thorongil noted a scent of ozone) he'd been keeping, but a wyvern was chasing him and wanted to eat the egg, and now he'd be willing to sell the egg to the party because that'd be better than watching it become an omelet.
- Sky Person:
- "My name translates to Casual Danger. Who are you?"
- Thorongil:
- "We are Megadeth -- pleased to meet you."
- Beeel:
- "You think Megadeth is better than the COG Goon Squad?"
- Silvana:
- "I thought `Guardians of the Night' was more tasteful, myself."
- Beeel:
- "Yeah, works for those of you with infravision."
- Thorongil:
- "You should meet the Danger Muffins..."
Silvana started to suggest taking the egg to the mountain where the Wind Temple was once based (since it still had some wards against evil), but during the conversation, the egg hatched, releasing an infant behir into the world. The tot fixated on Casual Damage and breathed a little lightning bolt his way as a sign of affection. (The bolt was 2' long and too weak to cause damage.) Casual Damage decided it really didn't want a pet behir and started backing away. Silvana tossed the behir some created food ("Behirs aren't very evil, just hungry."); the behir swallowed the gob of marshmallow whole and then sat still for a while (the chunk of food was too big for it to move).
It turned out that Casual Danger had planted the magical acorns that produced the grove in the valley, "because I got paid, and because trees are good." He'd kept one of the acorns, and Silvana traded a potion of friends to him for it. The acorn was vibrating, but it didn't do anything else exciting.
Casual Danger thought the green slimes were cute little creatures who liked to play hide and seek, though it was a bit scary the first time one jumped on his head. He also thought he'd been paid by a "bear-man ranger-type", though its big tawny mane looked more leonine.
Casual Danger took off, and the baby behir curled up to digest its meal. The party decided to press on, figuring they'd worry about the behir if it was still there when they came back.
As the party got close to their destination, they found themselves moving single-file along a path skirting the edge of the valley (featuring a nice 60-70 foot drop onto some lovely sharp stones). Pepper sensed danger ahead, and the party noticed a good spot for a landslide not far away. Various people flew ahead and surprised some trolls, who were waiting to trigger a landslide and attack whoever survived it. Much combat and a few troll reinforcements later, most of the trolls were down, except for one who ran away. Zenig flew below and started a fire, and the party started pushing troll bodies off the cliff and onto the blaze. While he was setting up the fire, Zenig saw the retreating troll move inside a cave near a bunch of rattlesnakes. Thorongil taunted the troll back out, but it failed its climbing check, fell off the cliff into the fire, and got attacked by some of the snakes.
Silvana, Stealth, and Ganeth investigated the troll cave and found some magical stuff amid the refuse (a small shield, a scroll tube, a heavy crossnow, and a hand axe). When Silvana tried to pick up the axe, a scorpion-like tail came out of the handle and stung her but failed to poison her. The stinger vanished, Silvana noticed a black scorpionesque rune on the axe's handle, and the elves got the loot into a sack and left.
Zenig spotted a leucrotta watching the party; it tried to flee, but Pepper, Beeel, Thorongil, and Zenig surrounded it easily. It turned out to be the leucrotta spokescreature they'd met earlier, so they decided to pummel it.
- Leucrotta:
- "Hey, guys! I'm on your side!"
- [Lots of damage is inflicted.]
- Leucrotta:
- "You're not accepting my surrender?"
- Beeel:
- "Did he ask for a surrender?"
- Thorongil:
- "He had just said he was on our side."
- Leucrotta:
- "I'm surrendering, you morons!"
- Beeel:
- "Oh, I guess he surrenders."
Thorongil and Beeel decided knocking the leucrotta weekly was prudent, so they did it. Beeel quickly spotted the necklace with the embedded hag's eye, but it was cursed on, so he shattered the gem instead (doing a d10 to each hag involved in making it).
A bit later, the party reached their target. The path led to a narrow rock bridge over a ravine, flanked by a pair of boulders at the far end. Beyond that was an enclosed quasi-courtyard strewn with boulders, and past there was a cave entrance covered by a wall of fire. Silvana figured a veil spell was covering the area, and Stealth summoned a bunch of bats to find illusions the hard way. The bats had an easier time than expected, since the bridge didn't show up on their sonar; instead of using a cool veil spell with a tactile component, the bad guys had gone with a whole pile of separate visual illusions which turned out to cover things like rattler-filled pits, ballistas (manned by ogres illusioned to look like goblins), packs of leucrotta (with their own war dog illusions), and giant-sized cave openings (generally detected by sacrificing bats, drawing attacks with Lorcan's phantasmal force creations, or analyzing fireball blast patterns).
A very long and involved combat ensued. In the early going, the main opponent of interest was a goblin bard (really a goblin, in plumed regalia) with interesting items like a nailgun, drums that cast uncontrollable hideous laughter, a fear-causing stiletto, and an unknown item that cast grease.
- Plumed One:
- "Can you be hit by normal weapons, or should I just not bother?"
- [More combat; a leucrotta hits Zenig.]
- Plumed One:
- "Aha! So +1 weapons can harm you. We're in business."
- Thorongil:
- "Can't leucrotta hit +2 creatures?"
- Plumed One:
- "They can? Oh."
Based on the number of annises and green hags appearing in the fight, the local Jagrmund contingent included at least two hag covens, possibly more. There was also someone in the cave who shouted, "Who dares challenge the mighty Kantor, King of Centaurs and Chosen of Jagrmund?"
As Frankel and Kantor argued and invisible spellcasters were doing their thing, Silvana fired off a sleet arrow that cut LOS between sides and generally slowed things down enough for the party to finish off the minions it was already engaging (netting another hag eye in the process). Eventually there was just the party and the Plumed One on their side of the sleet.
- Plumed One:
- "Let's call it a day, eh? I'm hardly going to fight all of you with a knife..."
- Thorongil:
- "Seems like Zenig is the only one doing anything to you..."
- Plumed One:
- "I have a boon that grants me invulnerability to all Prime Material beings."
- Zenig:
- "Isn't it a pity I'm here then?"
- Plumed One:
- "Do you accept bribes?"
- Zenig:
- "Well, I'd have to check my terms of engagement, but I don't think bribery is among my options. And, well, you know, I can't really ask you to surrender to me, either. So maybe you can negotiate with her." [indicating Silvana]
- Plumed One:
- "Surrender? Hardly. I don't mind exchanging this useless shell. In my next life I shall return as something better than a goblin. Fight on, Winged Avenger! At least I can say I was taken down by a planetar!"
- Silvana:
- "We really don't want to kill you in particular. You don't seem like a worshipper of Jagrmund."
- Plumed One:
- "Sorry, you'll have to take your turn. I'm busy holding off an army with a knife."
- Beeel:
- "Wait until next round, we'll deal with the knife."
- Plumed One:
- "Oh hell. Fine, I'll consider surrendering -- what are my terms?"
- Silvana:
- "It depends on your alignment, motivations, and how much trouble you cause us. In the best case, we let you go and you promise not to pester us."
- Plumed One:
- "I can see that we've all had enough adventuring for a day, eh? Time to recoup our losses and all that? Very well, let's call it a draw. I could do with a spot o' healing."
- Beeel:
- "Don't push your luck."
Meanwhile, Kantor and Frankel were having a...discussion...across the courtyard, and it soon became clear that Kantor was a raving lunatic. Here's a sample:
- Kantor:
- "OH, YOU'LL PAY NOW! I'VE ASKED MY MINIONS TO TAKE YOU DOWN!"
- Zenig:
- "You just can't do it yourself, can you?"
- Kantor:
- "HEY! YOU STAY OUT OF THIS! WHO ARE YOU?"
- Frankel:
- "You could consider it just proof in earnest that you need to take us seriously. Are you ready to listen? Or are you still too much a child?"
- Zenig:
- "Well, I'm sorry that I came too late for the formal introductions. Should we try this again from the beginning?"
- Kantor:
- "OH, WE'LL START AT THE VERY BEGINNING ALL RIGHT. BY JAGRMUND, I'LL MAKE EACH OF YOU PAY."
- Zenig:
- "Somehow that sounds more like an ending than a beginning."
- Kantor:
- "AAAAAARGH! HOW MANY OF YOU ARE THERE? IS THERE TIME ENOUGH IN THE UNIVERSE TO DO THE TORTURES I PLAN?"
Since the global point of all this was to retrieve Kantor, getting him to come out while the sleet was still cutting hag LOS seemed like a reasonable approach.
- Kantor:
- "AS SOON AS THIS WEATHER CLEARS, YOU'RE ALL GOING TO DIE."
- Ganeth: [hovering an inch over the grease spot]
- "A real villain would charge through the sleet, you wuss."
- Kantor:
- "SHOW YOURSELF AND I WILL CHARGE, SLEET OR NO SLEET."
- Ganeth:
- "I see me just fine. What's your problem?"
But someone smarter was holding Kantor back, so Silvana applied some healing, the Plumed One pointed out a set of planks the hags use to bridge the chasm, Ganeth scanned for invisible green hags sneaking through the sleet, and Kantor ranted some more. Silvana hired the Plumed One to compose a insulting song about Kantor that the party could sing and make Kantor charge madly out, but Ganeth (feeling particularly mean-spirited and wanting to bounce the charge off his stoneskin) started one of his own.
- Ganeth and the GoodTones:
- "Kantor always screams and yells,
but fights no better than he smells.
His voice is loud, his ego large,
but kobolds have survived his charge.
We heard he used to lead a tribe,
now he sits in fog and hides.
If minions tell him not to go,
he wimps out 'til they tell him so.
He's not too strong, he's not too bright,
I bet he bails before the fight."- Kantor:
- "SHUT UP! AAAAAAARGH!!!! I'M COMING TO GET YOU, SLEET OR NOT!"
- [Sound of something very large slipping and falling.]
- Kantor:
- "HEY! DON'T YOU RUN AWAY. I'M COMING AS SOON AS I GET UP. I'LL RAM MY LANCE SO FAR DOWN YOUR THROAT..."
- Ganeth and the GoodTones:
- "He rambles on about his lance,
sounds like he's got one up his ass."- [The sleet vanishes, Kantor gets up, Ganeth magic missiles an invisible hag.]
- Frankel:
- "Cessilia says hi."
- Kantor:
- "HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT MY CESSILIA, YOU ROGUE STALLION! I CHALLENGE YOU TO SINGLE COMBAT. RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW."
- Ganeth:
- "I bet he's a much better lay than you are, Kanty boy."
- Beeel: [to G]
- "Wow, you're really hitting below the belt. Or at least talking below the belt."
- Ganeth:
- "I haven't even speculated about the `can't' in Kantor yet..."
- Kantor: [to G]
- "YOU NEXT. RIGHT AFTER I'M DONE WITH THIS LITTLE FOAL."
- Frankel:
- "Actually, I haven't touched her. As I said, she says hi. She hopes you'll be back soon. In your right mind."
- Kantor: [growling more quietly, in centaur]
- "So, do you accept?"
- Frankel:
- "No, I don't. It's not how I operate. I haven't touched your tribe, I'm reclaiming you for them. The least you could show is some gratitude. But I suppose we'll have to free you from Jagrmund's unholy brainwashing, first."
- Kantor:
- "Don't underestimate the power of Jagrmund, little boy."
- [Kantor charges Frankel, but Frankel parries him.]
- Ganeth and the GoodTones:
- "Our guy daily beats up trolls,
yours can't even whack some foals."
A trio of annises entered the fray, a mountain giant stepped through an illusory rockface, another eight leucrotta showed up, and several PCs came within an annis strike of dying, but eventually the annises died and the giant withdrew, leaving Pepper and Kantor bleeding to death in the courtyard. Ganeth detected two more invisible hags, but before they could finish whatever they were casting, Lorcan pulled out the new hag's eye and Beeel smashed it. The remaining leucrotta inflicted some more damage before dying (providing yet another hag's eye), Silvana got Pepper off the weekly table, and Frankel stabilized Kantor at -6. In the chaos, the Plumed One managed to reload his nail gun but jammed it trying to shred a leucrotta.
Ten minutes after going down, Kantor the weekly woke up and started ranting.
- Kantor:
- "I am embroiled in the affairs of gods. Mortals such as yourselves should not tangle with me. You are bringing ruin upon yourself by taking me with you. All who I contact are destroyed. Look what happened to the sisters! I'm warning you for your own sake. My past is catching up with me and it is a storm that you cannot withstand. I have peered into the depths of the abyss. I have gazed into the eyes of the deep. And I have survived."
- Silvana:
- "Good for you. Unfortunately, your mind didn't fare as well as your body."
- Kantor:
- "My mind is as sharp as ever. And I tell you that you will not survive the night."
- Plumed One:
- "So, anyone interested in trading some magic items?"
Since the party was down a horse, they couldn't get back to the dwarven caves that day, but they decided to march through the night. (Kantor approved: "At least you won't die in your sleep.") Night fell, and the Plumed One offered to trade his "Cap of the Entertainer", which conferred some sort of spellcasting ability but interfered with his stealth; he got no takers. While Beeel tried to ascertain what sort of items the Plumed One might be interested in, Pepper's danger sense went off. The party found themselves surrounded by twenty red-eyed wolves with bodies made of mist. The wolves started a howling-based fear attack, which the Plumed One countered in standard bardic fashion (until the holy damage went off and he failed his save). Their physical attacks inflicted a point of CON loss, and when they died they dissolved back into mist. The wolves managed to take out another horse before passing on.
As the last wolves were going down, Frankel tried to coax Good out of his bracelet. When Good appeared, it looked like had been through a nasty combat of its own -- heavily wounded with big ugly claw marks and strips of dangling flesh. It didn't have much to say besides "hurt."
Another villain appeared on the scene and dropped a lightning ball into the combat; the wolves were immune, though there weren't really enough of them left for people to care much. The lightning put Good below 0 and dropped Kantor and the Plumed One into serious death's door territory. The zap was courtesy of a stoneskinned wand-wielding werewolf who called himself CloudKiller; he tried to escape in gaseous form, but his item wasn't cool enough to outdo Stealth's dispel magic. (His gloves did a good job absorbing the damage from a stack of electric arcs, though they didn't save his stoneskins.) Good was also caught in the dispel and disappeared (back into the bracelet, it turned out -- though it was odd that it was affected at all).
- CloudKiller:
- "I am here on a mission from the God. Do not interfere!"
- Beeel:
- "The god?"
- CloudKiller:
- "We do not reveal the God's name to the uninitiated."
- Beeel:
- "So you're not talking about Jagrmund?"
- CloudKiller:
- "How do you know his name?"
- Frankel:
- "You haven't heard? They changed that policy months ago. You should keep in touch more."
During the traditional Frankel/villain banter, CloudKiller said he'd been a mage in Silverton before becoming a werewolf, and that an undefined "we" were going to reclaim the city. He also took a big bite out of Frankel.
- CloudKiller:
- "The gift is not bestowed upon grassmunchers. Instead you will experience a short rabid existence, understanding Jagrmund in your final moments, and die a painful death."
- Silvana:
- "Hardly."
As CloudKiller died, Beeel spotted another two fog wolves a ways off. They started howling and scared a few people, lost morale themselves, tried to run, and died.
After some top-notch ointment and a big hit point transfer from Silvana, the Plumed One rejoined the living.
- Plumed One:
- "Who is Hanali?"
- Silvana:
- "Hanali is my goddess."
- Plumed One:
- "And she's not smart enough not to kill your friends?"
- Silvana:
- "I was hoping you'd save."
- Plumed One:
- "Next time you don't like my song, be gentler, OK?"
Silvana gave the Plumed One a small lamp that summoned a very minor genie (somewhat cooler than an unseen servant), and the Plumed One gave the party a password to use if they were ever captured by the goblin king's forces. (It sounded like "Sturga", and the Plumed One asked them not to pass it along to the dwarves.)
Frankel's big wolf bite started turning black around the edges, so Lorcan used a cure disease on it. Like any good grunty servant of Jagrmund, Kantor had a vampiric regen bracelet, rendering him immune to useful things like healing and death's door, so he died and stayed that way. Halana decided she needed to pray to Skerrit after this latest turn of events, so the party camped for the night.