> CELEBRITY QUOTES (and there's no truth to the rumor that these quotes
> came from Marc Stewart):
> "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole
> relationships."
> Sharon Stone
>
> Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're
> in."
> Courtney Cox Monica on "Friends"
>
> "I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in
> poverty. Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are
> apparently doing quite well for themselves."
> Jerry Garcia (Grateful Dead)
>
> "Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives,
> but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."
> Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)
>
> "ah, yes, divorce..., from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's
> genitals through his wallet."
> Robin Williams
>
> "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."
> Billy Crystal
>
> "Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't
> like and just give her a house."
> Rod Stewart
>
> "On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other
> hand, we can open all our own jars."
> Bruce Willis (On the difference between men and women)
>
> "And God said: 'Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything
> on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything on
> Satan."
> George Burns
>
> "My girlfriend always laughs during sex - no matter what she's
> reading."
> Steve Jobs (Founder: Apple Computers)
>
> "Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men.
> Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."
> Tiger Woods
>
> "Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer. But imprisonment
> turns the state into a gay dungeon-master."
> Rev. Jesse Jackson
>
> "My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
> Jack Nicholson
>
> "Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the
> only time of the month that I can be myself."
> Roseanne
>
> "According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable
> undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other
> women. They say that women are too judgmental, whereas, of course, men
> are just grateful."
> Robert De Niro
>
> "In the last couple of weeks I have seen the ads for the Wonder Bra.
> Is that really a problem in this country? Men not paying enough
> attention to women's breasts?"
> Hugh Grant
>
> "There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are
> having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe
> swelling. So what's the problem?"
> Dustin Hoffman
>
> "When the sun comes up, I have morals again."
> Elizabeth Taylor
>
> "There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I
> know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked.'"
> Jerry Seinfield
>
> AND THE NUMBER ONE QUOTE IS
> "See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only
> enough blood to run one at a time."
> Robin Williams
>
>