---------------------- Forwarded by Phillip M Love/HOU/ECT on 01/22/2001 
03:59 PM ---------------------------


Bruce Mills@ENRON
01/22/2001 03:52 PM
To: Phillip M Love/HOU/ECT@ECT
cc:  
Subject: FW: Too bad stupidity isn't painful...


>
>
> > >>  HOW DO THESE PEOPLE SURVIVE  ?!?!?!?
> > >> > > >>True story. I  went to McDonald's. I looked at the menu
> > >> > > >>and saw that you  could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken
> > >> > > >>McNuggets. I asked for a half  dozen nuggets "We don't have a
> > >> > > >>half-dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the  counter. "You
> >don't?"
> > >I
> > >> > > >>replied.
> > >> > > >>We only have  six, nine or twelve," was the reply. "So I can't
> > >> > > >>order a half dozen  nuggets but I can order six?" "That's
right."
> >So
> > >> > > >>I shook my  head and ordered six  McNuggets.
> > >> > > >>  ========================================
> > >> > > >>MAKES YOU WONDER HOW THESE PEOPLE CAN  SURVIVE!!!!!!
> > >> > > >>A lady at work was seen putting a  credit card into her floppy
> >drive
> > >> > > >>and pulling it out very  quickly. When inquired as to what she
> was
> > >> > > >>doing,  she said she was shopping on the Internet and they
asked
> > >> > > >>for a credit  card number, so she's using the  ATM"thingy".
> > >> > > >>   ========================================
> > >> > > >>  I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside
> > >> > > >>her car.  "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I
knew
> I
> > >> > > >>should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker.
> Now
> > >> > > >>can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to
> > >> > > >>not-to-distant convenient store) would have a battery to  fit
> >this?"
> > >> > > >>"Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm  too?" I asked. "No, just
> > >> > > >>this remote thingy," she answered,  handing it and the car keys
> to
> > >> > > >>me.  As I took the key  and manually unlocked the door, I
> > >> > > >>replied, "Why don't you  drive over there and check about the
> > >> > > >>batteries it's a long   walk.
> > >> > > >>   ========================================
> > >> > > >>Several years ago, we had an intern who was none too
> > >> > > >>swift. One  day she was typing and turned to a secretary and
> said,
> > >> > > >>"I'm  almost out of typing paper. What do I  do?"
> > >> > > >>'Just use copier  machine paper," the secretary told
> > >> > > >>her. With that, the  intern took her last remaining blank piece
> of
> > >> > > >>paper, put it on  the photocopier and proceeded to make five
> >"blank"
> > >> > > >>copies.
> > >> > > >>    ========================================
> > >> > > >>I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large
> > >> > > >>motor home  was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle
> was
> > >> > > >>in  dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked
like
> > >an
> > >> > > >>extra in "Twister". I asked the manager what had  happened. He
> told
> > >> > > >>me that the driver had set the "cruise  control" and then went
in
> > >the
> > >> > > >>back to make a sandwich.
> > >> > > >>   ========================================
> > >> > > >>IDIOTS AT WORK...
> > >> > > >>Sign  in a gas station: Coke -- 49 cents. Two for a dollar.
> > >> > > >>  ========================================
> > >> > > >>IDIOTS & COMPUTERS
> > >> > > >>My neighbor works in the operations department in the
> > >> > > >>central  office of a large bank. Employees in the field call
him
> > >when
> > >> > > >>they have problems with their computers. One night he got a
call
> > >> > > >>from a woman in one of the branch banks that had this
question:
> > >> > > >>"I've got smoke coming from the back of my  terminal. Do you
guys
> > >> > > >>have a fire  downtown?"
> > >> > > >>   ========================================
> > >> > > >>IDIOTS ARE EASY TO  PLEASE
> > >> > > >>I was sitting in  my science class, when the teacher
> > >> > > >>commented that the next  day would be the shortest day of the
> year.
> > >> > > >>My lab partner   became visibly excited, cheering and clapping.
I
> > >> > > >>explained to her  that the amount of daylight changes, not the
> > >actual
> > >> > > >>amount  of time. Needless to say, she was very  disappointed.
> > >> > > >>   ========================================
> > >> > > >>Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect
> > >> > > >>by placing  a metal colander on his head and connecting it with
> > >wires
> > >> > > >>to  a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in
> >the
> > >> > > >>copier and police pressed the copy button each time they
thought
> > >the
> > >> > > >>suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the  "lie detector"
> was
> > >> > > >>working, the suspect confessed.
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