Kerry E. Carter
Analyst
Simmons & Company International
(713) 236-9999
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                    Eva Chiang                                                              
                                         To:     Kerry Carter/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Eva       
                    11/19/01             Chiang/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Todd                    
                    01:19 PM             Friant/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Bill                    
                                         Grube/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Ron                      
                                         Harari/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Gaurav                  
                                         Khanna/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Geoff                   
                                         Ling/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Doug                      
                                         Lord/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Eric                      
                                         Madry/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Yogita                   
                                         Mathur/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Blake                   
                                         McLean/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl, Kyle                    
                                         Wade/SCI@Simmonsco-Intl                            
                                         cc:                                                
                                         Subject:     Twist on Forms of Government (Must    
                                         Read Last One ..... )                              
                                                                                            



Social Studies:  Some Useful Definitions

Feudalism
You have two cows.
Your lord takes some of the milk.

Fascism
You have two cows.
The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the
milk.

Pure Communism
You have two cows.
Your neighbors help take care of them and you all share the milk.

Applied Communism
You have two cows.
You must take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.

Totalitarianism
You have two cows.
The government takes them both and denies they ever existed.  Milk is
banned.

Pure Democracy
You have two cows. You and your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

Representative Democracy
You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the
milk.

Mexican Democracy
You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you into the army.

European Democracy
You have two cows.  The EU commission decides which regulations for feeding
and
milking apply. If there aren't any, they invent some. They pay you not to
milk the cows. They take both cows, shoot one, milk the other and pour the
milk down the drain. They then require you to fill out forms accounting for
the missing cows.

American Democracy
The government promises to give you two cows, if you vote for it.  After
the election, the president is impeached for speculating in cow futures.
The press dubs the affair "cowgate," but supports the president. The cows
sue you for breach of contract. Your legal bills exceed your annual income.
You settle out of court and declare bankruptcy.

Capitalism
You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and
the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

Enron Venture Capitalism
You have two cows.  You sell three of them to your publicly listed company,
using
letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute
a debt/ equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get
all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.  The milk
rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman
Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the
rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.  The annual report
says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.

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