I just wrote this little satire today. Can you suggest someplace that might
print it? I hope you enjoy it.

My Goshdarn Grinch, or How The Grinch Stole Christmas Yet Again

I woke up today
and what could it be
That caused such wildness
to come over me?

The day of the Grinch
Had arrived in our midst!
For 100 million dollars,
It should be a cinch!

The children awoke
And went to their folks.
&Mommy! Daddy! Show me the way!
We,ve waited so long! Not another day!8

Line upon line formed in the town
There was nowhere else in town to be found!

The theatres were packed
With red licorice and blue snacks.
And purple sanudes
Who had come from the moon.

Even those thneeds
Had come from the reeds
To fill the back rows
And demand for the show.

The lights went down
There was hardly a sound
Not a creature was stirring
Not even a thnowd.

The projector clicked and it sputtered!
And everyone shuddered as smoke filled the room.
But it started to tick
and then it went Zoom!

The film was beginning
Finally it was here.
How the Grinch Stole Christmas!
The movie of the year!

But soon it became disturbingly clear
As everyone covered their offended ears
Hollywood had written
Check after check
To fill reel after reel
Of such hideous content,
Was it really a deal?
This could not be what they meant!

Get the Titanic
To rise from the depths.
For the price tag of that
even Leonardo could act!

Poor Mr. Carrey painted in green
Overacting each line
and waving a sign,
&Look! Oh Look! I,m so awful and mean!8

The children turned to each other and wondered,
&How much money did he make for this blunder?8
20 million dollars! They started to laugh!
Who would pay for such horrible crap?

They got on their seats
and yelled to the beach,
&Let,s make our faces rubber and splutter
Lines made of blubber!8

&Christmas? There,s no meaning in that.
What we should do is all go and act!8
Or direct! All we need,s a paycheck!8
They said as they slapped Ron Howard,s back.

So they went to their rooms
And they looked in their mirrors,
And became self-consumed
Anything for effect, that,s the aesthetic!

The Holidays passed without even a laugh.
The presents unopened, the trees untrimmed,
The Grinch who stole Christmas
Had struck once again.

The parents all gathered
To discuss this conundrum,
To lift the spell from the town
That commercialism had sundered.

They thought and they thought
They even drank a darn lot
&Wait, I,ve got it!8
yelled one tall fop.

&They have been wronged
These children of ours!
Let,s show them the book!
Dr. Seuss was no crook!8

It was the Cat in the Hat
Who had spoken like that!

So the town came together
And there was only the sound
Of &How The Grinch Stole Christmas8
And my oh my! How did it resound!

All the children they danced
and they began to chant,
&Commercialism isn,t Christmas at all
Generosity and love, that,s our call!8

So The Grinch Who Stole Christmas
Was a movie for a time
That caused much irony and pain for our kind
But now it,s the book
It,s the book that we read
Not some 100 million dollar Hollywood sneeze.

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