A married man goes to confessional and he tells the
> priest, "I had 
> an affair with a woman... almost." 
> 
> The priest says, "What do you mean almost?" 
> 
> The man says, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed
> together but 
> then I stopped." 
> 
> The priest replies, "Rubbing together is the same as
> putting it 
> in. You're not to go near that woman again, now say
> five Hail 
> Marys and put $50 in the poor box." 
> 
> The man leaves confessional, goes over and says his
> prayers, 
> then walks over to the poor box. He pauses for a
> moment and 
> then starts to leave. 
> 
> The priest, who was watching him, quickly runs over
> to him 
> and says, "I saw that, you didn't put any money in
> the poor box!" 
> 
> The man replied, "Well Father, I rubbed up against
> it and you 
> said it was the same as putting it in!