Subject: On the first day! 
> 
> On the first day God created the cow. 
> 
> God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and 
> suffer 
> under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer I will 
> give 
> you a life span of sixty years." 
> 
> The cow said, "That's a kind of a tough life you want me to live for 
> sixty 
> years. Let me have twenty years and I'll give back the other forty." 
> 
> And God agreed. 
> 
> On the second day, God created the dog. 
> 
> God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who 
> comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years." 
> 
> The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll 
> give back the other ten." 
> 
> So God agreed (sigh). 
> 
> On the third day God created the monkey. 
> 
> God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give 
> you a twenty year life span." 
> 
> Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years?  I don't think 
> so. 
> Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" 
> 
> And God agreed again. 
> 
> On the fourth day God created man. 
> 
> God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy, 
> enjoy. 
> I'll give you twenty years." 
> 
> Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way man. Tell you what, I'll take 
> my 
> twenty, and the forty cow gave back, and the ten dog gave back and the 
> ten 
> monkey gave back. That makes eighty, okay?" 
> 
> "Okay," said God. "You've got a deal." 
> 
> So that is why for the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, have sex, 
> enjoy, and do nothing; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to 
> support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to 
> entertain 
> our grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit in front of the 
> house and bark at everybody. 
>