LOS ANGELES--Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan once again found
 himself in legal trouble Monday, when he and several members of his
extensive entourage were arrested for allegedly destroying a penthouse
suite at the Beverly Hills Hotel.

      Hotel officials say Greenspan, in town to address an annual
convention of Federal Reserve District Bank presidents, caused an estimated
 $8,500 in damages to the room, the surrounding hallway and the
swimming-pool area.

      Said Beverly Hills Hotel manager Giles Laurent: "The television
screen and cabinet had apparently been kicked in. Two chairs were thrown
out the window. The mattress was ripped and its stuffing was flung all over
 the room, as well as into the hallway." Laurent added that minutes before
police arrived, Greenspan, with the help of Deputy Treasury Secretary
Kenneth 
Dam, pushed a vending machine off the balcony overlooking the hotel's
swimming 
pool.

      During his two-day stay at the posh hotel, Greenspan also accumulated
a $781.55 room-service bill, which he has refused to pay until June 1,
when he says interest rates on German 10-year Euro-Bunds will rise to a
more favorable 5.5 percent.

      Witnesses to Greenspan's behavior during the days leading up to
Monday's arrest said the 75-year-old head of the Federal Open Market
Committee was in an unusually volatile mood.

      "Upon arriving Friday, Mr. Greenspan demanded that four large bowls
of M&Ms be delivered to his room, with all the orange ones removed,"
Beverly Hills Hotel concierge Alexander Poole said. "Then, when he got to
his room and saw the bowls, he flew into a rage, knocking over lamps and
screaming that he wanted the green M&Ms taken out, not the orange ones."

      Greenspan got into more trouble Saturday night, when he, Fed
Vice-Chair William J. McDonough and several other members of his inner
circle
visited a trendy L.A. night spot. Clubgoers reported seeing Greenspan, still
high 
off the dollar's rally against the yen last week, shout obscenities and
throw ashtrays 
at the club's DJ. When security personnel attempted to restrain him,
Greenspan became
belligerent, yelling, "I'm Alan F***ing Greenspan," and vowing to put
bouncer Frank Rizzo in a "hurt bracket." The incident is already being
compared to his infamous July 1997 fistfight with John Kenneth Galbraith at
 New York's China Club.

<<Greenspan_drunk015.jpg>>

Above: The famous Beverly Hills Hotel, site of the Fed chief's latest brush
 with the law.

      According to Federal Reserve Board insiders, Greenspan, buoyed by the
U.S. economy's recent turn-around has grown increasingly megalomaniacal 
in recent months.

      "He'll spend hours talking about how he's the greatest economist who
ever lived, how he's 'bigger than Keynes,'" said one member of the Fed
Board of Governors who wished to remain anonymous. "Every time he talks 
about single-handedly saving America from potential economic ruin following 
the Sept. 11th tragedy by manipulating interest rates, his bloated ego just
swells 
even more. It's just the sort of irrational exuberance he himself once
warned against."

      Monday's arrest is only the latest in a long string of legal troubles
for the controversial Greenspan, who has had 22 court dates since becoming
Fed chief in 1987. Economists recall his drunken 1994 appearance on CNN's
Moneyline, during which he unleashed a profanity-laden tirade against
Bureau of Engraving & Printing director Larry Rolufs and punched host Lou
Dobbs when he challenged Greenspan's reluctance to lower interest rates. In
 November 1993, he was arrested after running shirtless through D.C.
traffic while waving a gun. And some world-market watchers believe the
international gold standard has still not recovered from a May 1998
incident in which he allegedly exposed his genitals on the floor of the
Tokyo Stock Exchange.

      Greenspan's latest quandary now involves women and minorities.  When
asked
about U.S. Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill's speech at the Women
Entrepreneurs
Conference on March 19th, Greenspan was overheard saying "What a waste of
Paul's
time.  Women and business don't go together.  Just look at what Elaine
[Chao, U.S. 
Secretary of Labor] has done for our labor markets.  She's just making my
life hell.  
She's the perfect example of why affirmative action doesn't work."

How much longer can Greenspan last in his position?  Only time will tell.
But, he's 
looking more and more like a ticking time bomb.