See below. 
Robert W. Franksen 
Real Estate Administration Manager 
USG Corporation 
(312) 606-4507 
rfranksen@usg.com 
-----Original Message----- 
From:   Marwede, Andrew [SMTP:amarwede@dlj.com] 
Sent:   Wednesday, June 27, 2001 4:07 PM 
Subject:         
Importance:     High 
Sensitivity:    Confidential 
This was just forwarded to me by my mom.  You definitely only want to read 
this one during some quiet time... 
17-year-old Brian Moore had only a short time to write something for the 
Fellowship of Christian Athletes meeting. 
It was his turn to lead the discussion so he sat down and wrote. 
He showed the essay, titled "The Room" to his mother, Beth, 
before he headed out the door. 
"I wowed 'em." he later told his father, Bruce. 
"It's a killer, It's the bomb. It's the best thing I ever wrote." 
It also was the last. 
Brian's parents had forgotten about the essay when a cousin found it while 
cleaning out the teenager's locker at Teary Valley High School. 
Brian had been dead only hours, but his parents desperately wanted every 
piece of his life near them -- the crepe paper that had adorned his locker 
during his senior football season, notes from classmates and teachers, his 
homework. 
Only two months before, he had handwritten the essay about encountering 
Jesus in a file room full of cards detailing every moment of the teen's 
life. 
But it was only after Brian's death that Beth and Bruce Moore realized 
that their son had described his view of heaven. 
"It makes such an impact that people want to share it. You feel like you 
 are there." Mr. Moore said. 
Brian Moore died May 27, 1997, -- the day after Memorial Day. 
 He was driving home from a friend's house when his car went off 
Bulen-Pierce Road in Pickaway County and struck a utility pole. He emerged 
from the wreck unharmed but 
stepped on a downed power line and was electrocuted. 
Brian seemed to excel at everything he did. He was an honor student. He told 
his parents he loved them "a hundred times a day", Mrs. Moore said. He was a 
star wide receiver for the Teary's Valley 
Football team and had earned a four-year scholarship to Capital University 
in Columbus because of his athletic and academic abilities. He took it upon 
himself to learn how to help a fellow student who used a wheelchair at 
school. 
During one homecoming ceremony, Brian walked on his tiptoes so that the girl 
he was escorting wouldn't be embarrassed about being taller than him. 
He adored his kid brother, Bruce, now 14. 
He often escorted his grandmother, Evelyn Moore, who lives in Columbus, to 
church. 
"I always called him the "deep thinker", Evelyn said of her eldest grandson. 
Two years after his death, his family still struggles to understand why 
Brian was taken from them. 
They find comfort at the cemetery where Brian is buried, just a few blocks 
from their home. They visit daily. A candle and dozens of silk and real 
flowers keep vigil over the gravesite. 
The Moore's framed a copy of Brian's essay and hung it among the family 
portraits in the living room. 
"I think God used him to make a point. I think we were meant to find it and 
make something out of it," Mrs. Moore said of the essay. 
She and her husband want to share their son's vision of life after death. 
"I'm happy for Brian. I know he's in heaven. I know I'll see him again 
someday." Mrs. Moore said. 
"It just hurts so bad now." 
 The Room... 
 In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. 
There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall covered with 
small index card files. They were like the ones in libraries that list 
titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which 
stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endless in either direction, 
had very different headings. 
As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one 
that read "Girls I have liked." 
I opened it and began flipping through the cards. 
I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written 
on each one. 
And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was. 
This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my 
life. 
 Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, 
in a detail my memory couldn't match. 
A sense of wonder and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred 
within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. 
Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so 
intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching. 
A file named "Friends" 
was next to one marked 
"Friends I have betrayed." 
The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird. 
"Books I Have Read," 
"Lies I Have Told," 
"Comfort I have Given," 
"Jokes I Have Laughed at." 
Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: 
"Things I've yelled at my brothers." 
Others I couldn't laugh at: 
"Things I Have Done in My Anger" 
"Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents." 
I never ceased to be surprised by the contents. 
Often there were many more cards than I expected. 
Sometimes fewer than I hoped. 
I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. 
Could it be possible that I had the time 
in my years to write each of these thousands or even millions of cards? 
But each card confirmed this truth. 
Each was written in my own handwriting. 
Each signed with my signature. 
When I pulled out the file marked 
"Songs I have listened to," 
I realized the files grew to 
contain their contents. 
The cards were packed tightly, 
and yet after two or three yards, 
I hadn't found the end of the file. 
I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of music 
but more by the vast time I knew that file represented. 
When I came to a file marked 
"Lustful Thoughts," 
I felt a chill run through my body. 
I pulled the file out only an inch, 
not willing to test its size, 
and drew out a card. 
I shuddered at its detailed content. 
I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded. 
An almost animal rage broke on me. 
One thought dominated my mind: 
"No one must ever see these cards! 
No one must ever see this room! 
I have to destroy them!" 
In insane frenzy I yanked the file out. 
Its size didn't matter now. 
I had to empty it and burn the cards. 
But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, 
I could not dislodge a single card. 
I became desperate and pulled out a card, 
only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it. 
Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. 
Leaning my forehead against the wall, 
I let out a long, self-pitying sigh. 
And then I saw it. 
The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel With." 
The handle was brighter than those around it, 
newer, almost unused. 
I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches 
long fell into my hands. 
I could count the cards it contained on one hand. 
And then the tears came. 
I began to weep. 
Sobs so deep that they hurt. 
They started in my stomach and shook through me. 
I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, 
from the overwhelming shame of it all. 
The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. 
No one must ever, ever know of this room. 
I must lock it up and hide the key. 
But then as I pushed away the tears, 
I saw Him. 
No, please not Him. 
Not here. 
Oh, anyone but Jesus. 
I watched helplessly as He began to open the files and read the cards. 
I couldn't bear to watch His response. 
And in the moments I could bring myself to look at His face, 
I saw a sorrow deeper than my own. 
He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes. 
Why did He have to read every one? 
Finally He turned and 
looked at me from across the room. 
He looked at me with pity in His eyes. 
But this was a pity that didn't anger me. 
I dropped my head, 
covered my face with my hands and began to cry again. 
He walked over and put His arm around me. 
He could have said so many things. 
But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me. 
Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files. 
Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, 
one by one, began to sign 
His name over mine on each card. 
"No!" 
 I shouted rushing to Him. 
All I could find to say was 
"No, no, " 
as I pulled the card from Him. 
His name shouldn't be on these cards. 
But there it was, 
written in red so rich, 
so dark, 
so alive. 
The name of Jesus covered mine. 
It was written with His blood. 
He gently took the card back. 
He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards. 
I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, 
but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk 
 back to my side. 
He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, 
"It is finished." 
I stood up, and He led me out of the room. 
There was no lock on its door. 
There were still cards to be written. 
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." ---Phil. 4:13 
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only son, 
that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." 
If you feel the same way forward it to as many people as you 
can so the love of Jesus will touch their lives also. 
My "People I shared the gospel with" file just got bigger, 
how about yours? 
A. Andrew Marwede 
Private Client Services 
Donaldson, Lufkin & Jenrette Securities Corporation 
an affiliate of 
> CREDIT  FIRST 
> SUISSE  BOSTON 
200 West Madison Street, Suite 1800 
Chicago, IL  60606 
312.345.6069 or 866.870.6404 phone 
312.345.6056 fax 
andrew.marwede@csfb.com