---------------------- Forwarded by Chris Dorland/HOU/ECT on 11/15/2000 04:13 
PM ---------------------------


Michael McDermott <Michael.McDermott@spectrongroup.com> on 11/15/2000 
05:05:34 AM
To: "'Alexis Dodin'" <alexis.dodin@total.com>, "'Angus Cowan'" 
<Angus.Cowan@royalbank.com>, "'B.K. Milne'" <MILNEB@CIBC.CA>, "'Bradley'" 
<bdaly@txuenergy.com>, "'Bryan Moody'" <bhmoody@hotmail.com>, "'Carlo & 
Sophia'" <carloandsophia@hotmail.com>, "'Catriona Work'" 
<cmcdermott@BrunswickGroup.com>, "'Chris Blaker'" <blakerc@beaucanada.com>, 
"'Chris del Valle'" <delvalle@aep.com>, "'Chris Dorland'" 
<Chris.Dorland@enron.com>, "'David Redmond'" <david.redmond@enron.com>, 
"'Francesco Cicoli-Abad'" <FRANCIC@statoil.com>, "'George Potter'" 
<george.potter@txu-europe.com>, "'Haakon Olafsson'" 
<haakon_olafsson@enron.net>, "'Jason Blaker'" <jason.blaker@nbpcd.com>, 
"'Jasvinder Pal Singh Badyal'" <J.Badyal@accord.co.uk>, "'Kent Brown'" 
<kbrown@arciscorp.com>, "'Kevin McElroy'" <kmcelroy@nuheat.com>, "'Lionel 
Greene'" <lgreene@sempratrading.com>, "'Nils'" 
<Nils_Edstrand@instinet.co.uk>, "'Rob Laird'" <rlaird@oebi.com>, "'Stefan van 
Riet'" <stefan.vanriet@gs.com>, "'Urvesh'" <urvesh.kotecha@pgen.com>
cc:  
Subject: The result of the US election - This is very funny



>  >
>  >Not everyone can wait for the recount..
>  >
>  >
>  >---------------------------------------------
>  >NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE
>  >
>  >To the citizens of the United States of America,
>  >
>  >In the light of your failure to elect a President of the USA and
> thus to
>  >govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your
>  >independence, effective today.
>  >
>  >Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchial
> duties
> over
>  >all states, commonwealths and other territories.  Except Utah, which
> she
>  >does not fancy.  Your new prime minister (The rt. hon. Tony Blair,
> MP for
>  >the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a
> world
>  >outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without
> the need
>  >for further elections.  Congress and the Senate will be disbanded.
> A
>  >questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any
> of you
>  >noticed.
>  >
>  >To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the
> following
> rules
>  >are introduced with immediate effect:
>  >
>  >1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary.
> Then
>  >look up "aluminium".  Check the pronunciation guide.  You will be
> amazed
> at
>  >just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it.  Generally, you
> should
> raise
>  >your vocabulary to acceptable levels.  Look up "vocabulary".  Using
> the
>  >same
>  >twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like"
> and "you
>  >know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.
> Look up
>  >"interspersed".
>  >
>  >2. There is no such thing as "US English".  We will let Microsoft
> know on
>  >your behalf.
>  >
>  >3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian
> accents.  It
>  >really isn't that hard.
>  >
>  >4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as
> the
>  >good guys.
>  >
>  >5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The
> Queen",
>  >but only after fully carrying out task 1.  We would not want you to
> get
>  >confused and give up half way through.
>  >
>  >6. You should stop playing American "football".  There is only one
> kind of
>  >football.  What you refer to as American "football" is not a very
> good
>  >game.
>  >The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your
> borders
>  >may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football.  You
> will no
>  >longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper
> football.
>  >Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls.  It is a
>  >difficult
>  >game.  Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play
> rugby
>  >(which is similar to American "football", but does not involve
> stopping
> for
>  >a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like
>  >nancies).  We are hoping to get together at least a US rugby sevens
> side
> by
>  >2005.
>  >
>  >7. You should declare war on Quebec and France, using nuclear
> weapons if
>  >they give you any merde.  The 98.85% of you who were not aware that
> there
>  >is
>  >a world outside your borders should count yourselves lucky.  The
> Russians
>  >have never been the bad guys.  "Merde" is French for "shit".
>  >
>  >8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday.  November 8th will be a
> new
>  >national holiday, but only in England.  It will be called
> "Indecisive
> Day".
>  >
>  >9. All American cars are hereby banned.  They are crap and it is for
> your
>  >own good.  When we show you German cars, you will understand what we
> mean.
>  >
>  >10. Please tell us who killed JFK.  It's been driving us crazy.
>  >
>  >Thank you for your cooperation.
>  >
>  >
>  >
>  >
>  >Hugh Richards
>  >Senior Training Consultant - EMEA London
>  >Office: +44(0)207 786 3013
>  >Fax: +44(0)207 786 3001
>  >Mobile: +44(0)7720350706
>  >
>  >
>  >S2 Systems International, Ltd.
>  >30 City Road
>  >London, EC1Y 2AY
>  >United Kingdom
>  >
>  >
>  >CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE
>  >The information contained in this transmission is confidential.  It
> may
> also
>  >be legally privileged.  It is intended only for the addressee(s)
> stated
>  >above.  If you are not an addressee you should not disclose, copy,
> circulate
>  >or in any other way use the information contained in this
> transmission.
>  >Such unauthorized use may be unlawful.  If you have received this
>  >transmission in error, please telephone us immediately so that we
> can
>  >arrange for its return.
>  >
>  >
>  >
>  >
>
>
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