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From: JaneS1220@aol.com
Full-name: JaneS1220
Message-ID: <98.1d88dcfe.292c2924@aol.com>
Date: Tue, 20 Nov 2001 16:46:12 EST
Subject: Mammograms--funny
To: AClark9502@aol.com
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This is too funny !


Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but
there is no need to worry.  By taking a few minutes
each day for a week preceding the exam and doing the
following exercises, you will be totally prepared
for the test and best of all, you can do these
simple
exercises right in your home.

EXERCISE ONE:

Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast in

door. Shut as hard as possible and lean on the door
for
good measure. Hold that position for five seconds.
Repeat again in case the first time wasn't effective
enough.

EXERCISE TWO:

Visit your garage at 3AM when the temperature of the

cement floor is just perfect.  Take off all your
clothes
and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast
wedged
under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to
slowly
back the car up until your breast is sufficiently
flattened and chilled.
Turn over and repeat with the other breast.

EXERCISE THREE:

Freeze two metal bookends over night. Strip to the
waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the
bookends against one of your breasts.
Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set
up an appointment with the stranger to meet next
year
and do it again.

YOU ARE NOW TOTALLY PREPARED!

AND, just a thought for all the women out
there.........
MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown,
MENopause.. Ever notice how all of women's problems
start with men?....and when we have real trouble,
it's
HYSterectomy!!!

Send this to all the women you know and brighten
their
day!!! AND, don't forget to have a mammogram