This is an old one but still good.
 -----Original Message-----
From: 	Appling, Mike  [mailto:mappling@chematch.com] 
Sent:	Friday, August 17, 2001 2:45 PM
To:	Brett Treadwell (E-mail) ; David Elias (E-mail) ; David Zaozirny (E-mail) ; Dwayne Hyzak (E-mail) ; George Appling (E-mail) ; Jeff Thomas (E-mail) ; Jerry Jernigan (E-mail) ; Jes Morris (E-mail) ; John Carr (E-mail) ; Kelly Boston (E-mail) ; Kevin Baros (E-mail) ; Kregg Lunsford (E-mail) ; Mark Whitt (E-mail) ; Steven Jernigan (E-mail) ; Steven Wolf (E-mail) ; Wade Pursell (E-mail) ; Wade Sanders (E-mail) ; William evans (E-mail) 
Subject:	FW: Things you'll never hear women say.


 
-----Original Message-----
From: Boase, Allan 
Sent:  Thursday, August 16, 2001 8:54 AM
To: Appling, Mike; Brown, Nancy;  Exley, Melisa; Giraldo, Melissa; Josephs, Bob; Leahy, Steve; McAfee, Larry;  Medeles, Ismael; Orjuela, Natalie; Peyton, Mickie; Snear, Clay; Venezia,  Charles
Subject: FW: Things you'll never hear women  say.
 
 
Things you'll never hear women say. 
>  > > 
> > > 1. You know, I've been complaining a lot lately. I  don't 
> > > blame you for ignoring me. 
> > > 
>  > > 2. The new woman in my office is a real beauty, and a 
> >  > stripper too. I invited her over for dinner on Friday. 
> > >  
> > > 3. While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on  
> > > fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal  
> > > they'll still cover. 
> > > 
> > > 4.  Bar food again!? Great! 
> > > 
> > > 5. I liked that  wedding even more than ours. You know, 
> > > your ex-girlfriend has  class. 
> > > 
> > > 6. That woman is wearing the same  outfit as I am. Cool, 
> > > I'm gonna go talk to her. 
> >  > 
> > > 7. Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" at all times,  
> > > then you don't have to mess with it anymore. 
> >  > 
> > > 8. Honey, isn't tonight your night out with the boys?  
> > > You need your time with them. 
> > > 
>  > > 9. It's only the third quarter,   we should order a 
> >  > couple more pitchers. 
> > > 
> > > 10. My mother  is going to take care of the tab, so order 
> > > another round for  you and your friends. 
> > > 
> > > 11. I'm so happy  with my new hairstyle, I don't think 
> > > I'll ever change it  again. 
> > > 
> > > 12. Damn! I love when my pillow  smells like your cigars and 
> > > beer.   You passed out  before brushing your teeth again, ya' big silly! 
> > > 
>  > > 13. You are so much smarter than my father. 
> > >  
> > > 14. Are you sure you've had enough to drink? 
> >  > 
> > > 15. I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the  
> > > house. 
> > > 
> > > 16. You're so  sexy when you're hung over. 
> > > 
> > > 17. I love it  when you change channels all the time. It 
> > > really helps me  find out what else is on! 
> > > 
> > > 18. Let's  subscribe to Hustler. 
> > > 
> > > 19. If you need me,  I'll be out painting the house. 
> > > 
> > > 20. I love  it when you ride your Harley, I just wish you had 
> > > more time  to ride. 
> > > 
> > > 21. Honey, our new neighbor's  daughter is sunbathing 
> > > again, come see! 
> > >  
> > > 22. No, no, I'll take both of our cars to have the oil  changed. 
> > > 
> > > 23. Your mother is way better  than mine.