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Date: Mon, 21 May 2001 11:58:02 -0400
From: "Incognito, Scott J" <Scott.Incognito@usa.xerox.com>
Subject: PEOPLE YOU SEE IN A NITE CLUB, STARRING:
To:
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CAPTAIN WORKOUT
This guy spends all week in the gym and needs little or no reason to wear
his skin tight shirt you can see his heart beating and parade's around the
club like he is Mr. Universe.
SHAMALEKA SPANDEX
You know her . . . 300 lbs. size 48, buys a size 6 red and yellow spandex
outfit. To the horror of others, she wears it to the club.
JOHNNY ONEDRINK
Takes three hours to finish one drink, then tries to fool everyone for
another hour with a glass full of ice water & a straw. Has $3.50 in his
pocket and a putt putt token.
THE O.G.'s
Stands for "Old Guys". These guys just can't get over the fact that they are
TOO OLD to be at the club. Their clubbing days are so far behind that their
kids can legally buy them alcohol.  They try to be down with the younger
generation by wearing gold fronts and try to speak slang using phrases like
"What's up money!" and "That's fresh!"
THE OOOH GIRL
She's that girl that's basically doing the two step dance, until her song
comes on and she screams to her girl friends, "OOOH GIRL, THAT'S MY SONG!!!"
From this point on it's shake what your mamma gave ya and she will dance
with what ever is in front of her, guy, girl, bar stool, wall, speakers,
cigarrette machine, etc.
WASTE OF TIME WILLY
This is the one that buys a new outfit for the club; travels miles from
home, at night to the club; pays $15.00 to get in the club; and when he's
finally in the club he just stands against the wall sipping on a glass of
Pepsi fronting like it's rum-n-coke.
BILLBOARD VANILLA ICE WANNABE
Stepped out of the latest rap video, he feels the need to let everyone in
the club know what name brand designer clothing he's wearing, down to his
socks because he must have that one pant leg up. It may be pitch black in
the club, but he's got $300 Versace sunglasses on. He's also the  one making
a call from the noisy dance floor on his star tac cell phone, with a bottle
of MOET (with the label facing outward so everyone can see) in his other
hand...
TAKIANNA & LAQUITA
The female equivalent of Siskel & Ebert,but they don't review movies. They
notice everthing from head to toe... Also known for staring people down for
long periods of time! "Those are fake!" "Assa Grande!!" "His baby mamma must
dress him."
THE 1st AND 15th POSSE
We only see them in the club around these dates...
TOUCHY FEELY TYRONE
He's the guy that loves to walk all over the club when it's crowded
squeezing through girls and getting his free feels.
ROBIN LEECH
Not the TV host. She has no money, but somehow gets some sucker to buy her
drinks all night---usually BILLBOARD VANILLA ICE WANNABE (see above for
details).
LOCKDOWN LEROY
Has been in and out of jail so many times, he has no clue as to what is in
or out of style. He shows up in a "Malcolm X" cap, gold fronts, an "Eight
Ball" leather jacket and a silk polka dot shirt....
SHANEQUA STROBELITE & CO.
They look good in the club, but outside..... AHHH DAMN!! And I bought her a
drink!

  _____

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