Why I fired my secretary.....
Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday, and I wasn't feeling too hot that
morning anyway.  I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant
and say "Happy Birthday," and probably have a present for me. She didn't
even say "Good Morning," let alone any "Happy Birthday." I thought, "Well,
that's wives for you, the children will remember."  The children came in
to  breakfast and didn't say a word. When I started to the office I was
feeling pretty low and despondent.  As I walked into my office, my secretary,
Janet, said, "Good morning, boss. Happy Birthday.! ! "  And I felt a
little better; someone had remembered. I worked until noon.  Then, Janet
knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and
it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me." I said, "By
George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go." We went to
lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; we went out to the country to a
little private place.  We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.
On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful
day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess
not."  She said, "Let's go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment she
said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into
something more comfortable." "Sure," I excitedly replied. She went into
the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a big
birthday cake, followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends,all
singing Happy Birthday.
And there I sat...on the couch...naked.