-----Original Message-----
From: John Bolen [mailto:JBolen@mdgibson.com]
Sent: Monday, August 28, 2000 8:46 AM
To: Emmye (E-mail)
Subject: FW: MORE POLITICAL BANTER. .


I thought you would enjoy this!

> -----Original Message-----
> From: Vicky Alvarez [SMTP:VALVAREZ@shb.com]
> Sent: Friday, August 25, 2000 9:27 AM
> To: Vicky Alvarez
> Subject: MORE POLITICAL BANTER. .
>
>   CLASSIC VERSION:
> > > >
> > > >  The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,
> building
> > his
> > > > house
> > > >
> > > >  and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks
> he's a
> > fool
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >  and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter,
> the ant
> > is
> > > >
> > > >  warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so
> he dies
> > out
> > > > in
> > > >
> > > >  the cold.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >  MODERN VERSION:
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >  The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,
> building
> > his
> > > > house
> > > >
> > > >  and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks
> he's a
> > fool
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >  and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter,
> the
> > > > shivering
> > > >
> > > >  grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why
> the ant
> > > > should
> > > >
> > > >  be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and
> > starving.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >  CBS, NBC and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
> > grasshopper
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >  next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table
> > filled
> > > > with
> > > >
> > > >  food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this
> be, that
> > in
> > > > a
> > > >
> > > >  country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to
> suffer
> > so?
> > > >
> > > >  Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and
> everybody
> > > > cries
> > > >
> > > >  when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green."
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >  Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the
> ant has
> > > > gotten
> > > >
> > > >  rich off the back of the grasshopper and calls for an immediate
> tax
> > hike
> > > > on
> > > >
> > > >  the ant to make him pay his "fair share." Finally, the EEOC
> drafts
> > the
> > > >
> > > >  "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act," retroactive to the
> > beginning
> > > > of
> > > >
> > > >  the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a
> proportionate
> > number
> > > > of
> > > >
> > > >  green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive
> taxes, his
> > > > home
> > > >
> > > >  is confiscated by the government.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >  Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a
> > > > defamation
> > > >
> > > >  suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of
> federal
> > > > judges
> > > >
> > > >  that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare
> recipients.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >  The ant loses the case. The story ends as we see the
> grasshopper
> > > > finishing
> > > >
> > > >  up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house
> he is
> > in,
> > > >
> > > >  which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around
> him
> > because
> > > > he
> > > >
> > > >  doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. The
> > grasshopper
> > > > is
> > > >
> > > >  found dead in a drug-related incident, and the house, now
> abandoned,
> > is
> > > >
> > > >  taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful
> > > > neighborhood.
>
>