Cows and World Order

 A CHRISTIAN: You have two cows. You keep one and give
 one to your neighbor.

 A REPUBLICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none.
 So what?

 A DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none.
 You feel guilty for being successful. You vote people
 into office who tax your cows, forcing you to sell one
 to raise money to pay the tax. The people you voted for
 then take the tax money and buy a cow and give it to
 your neighbor. You feel righteous.

 A SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government takes one
 and gives it to your neighbor.

 A COMMUNIST: You have two cows. The government seizes
 both and provides you with milk.

 A FASCIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both
 and sells you the milk. You join the underground and
 start a campaign of sabotage.

 DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. The
 government taxes you to the point you have to sell both
 to support a man in a foreign country who has only one
 cow, which was a gift from your government.

 CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. You sell
 one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

 BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. The
 government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other,
 pays you for the milk, then pours the milk down the
 drain.

 AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell
 one, and force the other to produce the milk of four
 cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

 A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on
 strike because you want three cows.

 A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign
 them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow
 and produce twenty times the milk.

 A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You re-engineer
 them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and
 milk themselves.

 AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows, but you don't
 know where they are. You break for lunch.

 A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them
 and learn you have five cows. You count them again and
 learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn
 you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open
 another bottle of vodka.

 A MEXICAN CORPORATION: You think you have two cows, but
 you don't know what a cow looks like. You take a nap.

 A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which
 belongs to you. You charge for storing them for others.

 A BRAZILIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You enter
 into a partnership with an American corporation. Soon
 you have 1000 cows and the American corporation declares
 bankruptcy.

 AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship
 them.