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This foot-and-mouth virus that is sweeping throughout Europe is enough to 
make even the greatest carnivore turn into a strict vegetarian. I seriously 
doubt that it would actually come to that, but if it did, I could probably 
swing it... maybe. However, I can't vouch for Sunny and Edgar. Recently, 
JokeMistress and me ordered take out from this cool vegetarian place by us. 
We had some Soy Bean Burger left over, so I placed it down for them eat. I 
wasn't very surprised when they didn't maul it, but what I didn't expect was 
how insulted they were by my well-intended gesture. They looked at me as if 
to say, "Are you kidding us?" I told them I was and promised never to do it 
again.    

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DRINKING BUDDIES

A couple of drinking buddies who are airplane mechanics are in a hangar at 
JFK New York. It's fogged in and they have nothing to do. 

One of them says to the other, "Man, have you got anything to drink?" 

The other one says, "Nah, but I hear you can drink jet fuel, and it will 
kinda give you a buzz." 
So they do drink it, get smashed and have a great time, like only drinking 
buddies can. 

The following morning, one of the men wakes up and he just knows his head 
will explode if he gets up, but it doesn't. He gets up and feels good. In 
fact, he feels great! No hangover! 

The phone rings. It's his buddy. The buddy says, "Hey, how do you feel?" 

"Great", he said! "Just great"! The buddy says, "Yeah, I feel great too, and 
no hangover. That jet fuel stuff is great. We should do this more often! 

"Yeah, we could, but there's just one thing . . . " 

"What's that?" 

"Did you fart yet?" 

"No . . . " 

"Well, DON'T, 'cause I'm in Phoenix."


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