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                            THE STANDARD'S
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Friday, June 1, 2001

TOP GROKS:
* What's Your Pleasure? Sorry, No Tech Rebounds
* Palm? Please - So Uncool!
* Analysts as Demons, Part 273

PUNDITS SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS:
* Rob Walker, Slate: On the trail of a 'merger of equals'
* David Futrelle, Money.com: It's deja vu all over again


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TOP GROKS
~~~~~~~~~
What's Your Pleasure? Sorry, No Tech Rebounds

While not quite as animated as the office pool predicting the next
alcohol bust for a presidential offspring, stock scribes' recent banter
over the future of tech stocks concluded that a bust of a different
kind is already here - and isn't going away anytime soon.

So what if tech stocks are up 30 percent or so since mid-April?
Jawboning over what the market might do in the short term is "about
as intellectually stimulating as reading the phone book," kvetched
Motley Fool's Bill Mann. As for forecasting the market's next moves,
"I personally don't give a damn," Mann chest-thumped. "That's like
worrying about who is leading at the one-mile mark in a marathon."
Newsweek columnist Jane Bryant Quinn pooh-poohed bright-eyed
investors who treat tech stocks "as if they were lottery tickets -
hoping to win your money back by a lucky draw." Better not hold
your breath, she warned. "Historically, bubbles don't pop and
reinflate," James Stack of InvesTech Research told the Newsweek
columnist.

Read the full Grok:
http://www.thestandard.com/article/0,1902,26841,00.html?nl=stg


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Palm? Please - So Uncool

It wasn't that long ago that all of Wall Street was cheering for Palm,
notes SmartMoney.com. The same could be said of the media. But in
the two weeks since Palm announced that - whoops - fourth-quarter
revenues would sneak in at less than half of the $300 million-ish
predicted, Palm seems to have run out of buzz.

Which do business scribes dislike more, Palm's product or the
company? It's a toss-up. On Yahoo's FinanceVision, commentator
Caleb Goddard bragged about a phone-number swapping session
where his pen-and-paper combo had the job done long before his
Palm Pilot-wielding friend had even figured out how to switch from
the keyboard to graffiti mode. As for reading on the dinky screens,
forget it.

Read the full Grok:
http://www.thestandard.com/article/0,1902,26843,00.html?nl=stg


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Analysts as Demons, Part 273

What's next, a Securities Analyst Registry? Neighbors can log on to
find out whether one of these tainted individuals is residing near
them. Maybe local police can hand out flyers. Maybe it's time to
resurrect the scarlet A, this time for Analyst.

Round one of the media's post-heyday coverage of Net analysts had
a decidedly deconstructionist angle: An up-close-and-personal look
at the way the ex-heroes had spent their bubble days. The early
phase of round two has continued the dissection, but with a twist:
Rather than report more me-too exposes of naughty analyst behavior,
business journos are covering the regulatory investigations into those
naughty analysts. It's the same technique the media used with
Princess Diana. Those mags that purported to be above the slavish
post-mortem coverage simply worked in their share of Di photos by
casting their coverage as a look at the media crush.

Read the full Grok:
http://www.thestandard.com/article/0,1902,26846,00.html?nl=stg


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PUNDITS SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rob Walker, Slate

Upshot: On the trail of a "merger of equals."

Do the Math: Lucent Technologies wanted a merger with Alcatel, but
the all-stock transaction reportedly would have dealt Alcatel
shareholders 58 percent of the new company, and Lucent 42 percent.
That looked like an acquisition to everyone but CEO Henry Schacht
& Co.

Seriously, Have You Ever Seen One? "Yes, the merger of equals, an
interesting creature, one that is captivating in the abstract but elusive
in real life."

What Was Henry Thinking? After all, someone has to have the top
job, and then there's the issue of how to divide board seats.
"Variations on this not-shocking discovery - that in any business
merger, one side is going to end up dominant - are played out
constantly."

Beggars Can't Be Choosers: "You would think that Lucent and
Schact would be highly motivated to close the deal and to recognize
that they were not exactly dealing from a position of great strength.
In short, you'd think they'd realize that they were being acquired."

Lucent's Acquisition Epiphany
http://slate.msn.com/cx/moneybox/entries/01-05-30__109015.asp


----------------------------------------------------------------------


David Futrelle, Money.com

Upshot: It's deja vu all over again.

Once Burned, Never Shy: Didn't the tech crash cure most investors
of the idea that there are no second chances? No way. The recent
rally saw the return of bubble-thinking in all of its dubious glory, as
investors plunged back into an assortment of momentum stocks
simply because they were going up.

Tied to the Rails: When Morgan Stanley analyst Jay Deahna recently
issued the not-so-subtly titled report "The Train has Left the Station,"
he created a mini buying frenzy for Teradyne and LAM Research as
investors scrambled to get aboard before it was too late. Too late for
what? The stocks Dehna mentioned are about even with where they
were.

Mea Culpa: "My point here isn't to take pot shots at anyone's stock
picking ability (after all, I'm the guy who recommended Sun last
Friday). The point is that you should base your investment decisions
on a stock's fundamentals - not on fear or greed."

The Tech Express Goes Local
http://www.money.com/money/depts/techinvestor/archive/010531.html


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MORE LINKS
~~~~~~~~~~
Cyberian Winds Blind PC Connection
http://www.msnbc.com/news/580762.asp?cp1=1

Do AOL Insider Sales Belie the Buyback?
http://interactive.wsj.com/articles/SB991170361420468941.htm
(Paid registration required.)

Breaking Up Is (Still) Hard to Do
http://www.msnbc.com/news/578467.asp?cp1=1

What's Next for Microsoft?
http://www.cnbc.com/010530plotkin-stocks.html

Talking Heads' Home on Hold
http://www.nypost.com/business/31497.htm

No Summer Romance in Store for AT&T Wireless
http://www.thestreet.com/tech/telecom/1444593.html

The Prodigal Dot-Coms' Return
http://www.businessweek.com/magazine/content/01_23/b3735094.htm

Venture Capitalists Seek Less Adventure
http://www.usnews.com/usnews/issue/010604/biztech/venture.htm

Rich Prospects for Online Luxury Stores
http://www.forbes.com/2001/05/29/0529luxuryshopping.html


STAFF
~~~~~
Written by Deborah Asbrand (dasbrand@world.std.com).

Edited by Suzan Revah (srevah@thestandard.com).

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