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	Becky Spencer
	03/14/2001 05:17 PM
		
		 To: Dan J Hyvl/HOU/ECT@ECT
		 cc: 
		 Subject: Re: joke for today

Can you believe it's 5:15 p.m. and I finally had time to read your joke?  
AND, because it's the end of the day, and this joke being what it is, I can't 
make my mouth work to read this out loud!  

Good one!





	Dan J Hyvl
	03/14/2001 08:45 AM
		 
		 To: Kaye Ellis/HOU/ECT@ECT, Pat Radford/HOU/ECT@ECT, Stacy E 
Dickson/HOU/ECT@ECT, Becky Spencer/HOU/ECT@ECT
		 cc: 
		 Subject: joke for today

NEW LANGUAGE
-Submitted by PATRICIA L GOONETILLEKE

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will 
be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other 
possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded 
that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year 
phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make 
the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of 
the"k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year,?when the 
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like 
"fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to 
reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will 
enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to 
akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in 
the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" 
with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year,?ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd 
from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer 
kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor 
trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze 
drem vil finali kum tru! And zen ve vil tak over ze  world!