I thought you'd appreciate the humor in these.  Actually the first one's kind 
of scary!!  Just in case you think I made this stuff up the web site's at the 
bottom.  

The U.S. Department of Agriculture is actively proposing that animal 
carcasses with cancers,
     tumors or open sores be regarded merely as unaesthetic but safe for 
human consumption as
        long as the offending part is cut away. The proposal is part of a 
general loosening of
     slaughterhouse inspection standards, whose public comment period ends 
Aug. 29. One critic
    already weighed in, saying she did not want to "eat pus from a chicken 
that has pneumonia," but
    also included as benign by the proposal are glandular swellings, 
infectious arthritis and diseases
                             caused by intestinal worms.



                               In Their Own Words

     Hubert Penrod Jr., on why the May promotion he had scheduled for his 
Huge Hooter Haven
     strip club in Nashville had failed to attract men who had come to town 
for the Billy Graham
    Crusade that weekend: "I know all the porn stars, but I don't exactly 
keep up with preachers.
     Hell, I thought Billy Graham was some singer or something. It never 
entered my mind that (it
                was) some preacher (who) was filling up the football stadium."



http://www.msnbc.com/comics/nw.asp