Friends don't let friends take home ugly men
-------Women's restroom, Starboard, Dewey
Beach, DE

Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" its
"Hi, how are you?"
-------Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia

No matter how good she looks, some other guy
is sick and tired
of putting up with her shit.
-----Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill,
Chapel Hill, N. Carolina

A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or
testicles, you're
going to have trouble with it.
-------Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort,
Dallas,Texas

Express Lane: Five beers or less.
-Sign over one of the urinals, Ed Debevic's,
Beverly Hills, CA

You're too good for him.
-Sign over mirror Women's room, Ed Debevics,
Beverly Hills, CA

No wonder you always go home alone.
  -Sign over mirror in Men's room, Ed Debevic's, Beverly
Hills, CA

The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast
plate open.
-------Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

If you voted for Clinton in the last election, you
can't take
a dump here. Your asshole is in Washington.
-------Men's room Outback Steakhouse, Tacoma,
Washington

Beauty is only a light switch away.
-------Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North
Carolina

If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of
life, then
let's all get wasted together and have the time of our
lives.
-------Armand's Pizza, Washington, D.C.

Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and
doesn't die.
-------Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is
in
your hands.
-------Men's restroom, Lynagh's, Lexington, KY