Writings

"The art of living lies in the power to enjoy" - one of my favorite phrases. It was supposedly said by Konstantin Wecker, a German singer/songwriter. Of course, he probably said it in German... I don't know, though - it might not have been him. All I have to prove it is a mug I bought in Prague lots of years ago (which has the phrase, and his name under it). And I cannot be sure the mug makers really cared about exactness. The reason why I say this, is that I've searched the entire web (well, almost) and have found absolutely no evidence that Konstantin ever said that, in English or German. And if you can't find it on the web... well, it's suspicious, that's all. But another good quote about the art of living I found (since I seem to be really interested in this art of living) was that "The art of living lies in the power to die young, at a very old age". Isn't this great?

"Two things to aim for in life - to get what you want and to enjoy it" - this wise saying came from a fortune cookie not too long ago. I have it taped to my monitor now. One of the greatest truths in life... I guess the first saying (supposedly by KW) is a subset of this one. Another subset: "Be careful what you wish for - you just might get it." If there's one thing I believe, it's that if you really want something, you will make it happen. And because of that, you better be really careful. Choosing the direction you will walk in is even more important that the walking itself.

"Take life in your own hands and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame." - Erica Jong

"Our first and last love is self-love" - another wise fortune cookie line. There is a story that goes with this one: A very good friend of mine broke up with his girlfriend a few years back. He was really heart-broken and angry, as he discovered there was another guy involved. Well, like with all break ups, it wasn't pretty, but I think he was especially hurt, because he had thought she was the person he would spend the rest of his life with. We got to talk a lot about his feelings, about what he wanted, about his previous girlfriends, and so on. It's a long story, I can't explain everything here, but my point is that he was really disappointed with her, with himself, with life, and with love, in general. And then I told him "Finish the phrase: Our first and last love is..." And he said "I don't know why you are telling me this! Beth (to make up a name) was not my first and will not be my last one, either" (actually, before this, he said "sweet and sour pork?" I love his sense of humor.) When I told him the ending, he smiled, nodded, looked at me and ... nah! ... I am making this up - we were really just talking on the phone. :-) All he actually did was say "Ah! Now I see why you are telling me this." I'd like to think he liked the fortune and that it helped him through that hard period to remember this truth. Now he is happily married to a great gal he met about a year after that. Isn't life great?

"In any moment of decision the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing." Theodore Roosevelt

"Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty." Mother Teresa - Yes, the great paradox of life: you are never alone, and yet you are always alone.

"Dream as if you'll live forever... live as if you'll die today." James Dean (some say it was Gandhi)

And a word of optimism for all those who might need it - Everything is okay in the end. If it's not okay, then it's not the end.

If you want happiness for an hour -- take a nap.
If you want happiness for a day -- go fishing.
If you want happiness for a month -- get married.
If you want happiness for a year -- inherit a fortune.
If you want happiness for a lifetime -- help someone else.
-- Chinese proverb

It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
-- Agnes Repplier

Noble deeds and hot baths are the best cures for depression.
-- Dodie Smith

Happiness is good health and a bad memory. -- Ingrid Bergman

Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well. -- Josh Billings

For the people I loved and lost - my grandfather, my uncle, Vasco - When a loved one dies, a piece of us dies with him/her. And this piece never recovers, never heals, never stops hurting. And the only thing that helps is time. Not because the pain goes away, but because we learn how to deal with it.

And so that things don't get too boring, here is a quote I don't agree with:

"Next to God, love is the word most mangled in every language. The highest form of regard between two people is friendship, and when love enters, friendship dies." Richard Bach - This is NOT true. No, actually I shouldn't say that. The truth is, this is very common. Both friendship dying when love enters, and friendship never developing when you start off with just love - all this definitely happens. But that's how you know it's not the real thing.

And so you don't think I generally disagree with Richard Bach, here are a few great quotes from him:

"'Boredom between two people, she said one evening, doesn't come from being together, physically. It comes from being apart, mentally and spiritually.' Obvious to her, it was such a startling thought to me that I wrote it down." Richard Bach. That's why love without friendship is such a doomed effort.

"The opposite of loneliness, it's not togetherness. It is intimacy." Richard Bach.

"Here is a test to find out whether your mission in life is complete. If you're alive, it isn't."

And finally, remember the phrase at the top of the page? It's very important. And look what I just found on the web:

Most people enter into relationships with an eye toward what they can get out of them, rather than what they can put into them.

The purpose of a relationship is to decide what part of yourself you'd like to see "show up," not what part of another you can capture and hold.

The purpose of a relationship is not to have another who might complete you; but to have another with whom you might share your completeness.

God "Conversations with God (Book 1)" through Neale Donald Walsch (adapted)

Amazing, isn't it! I am not the only one who has thought of that! But that's life for you - there are two things I fear: I am afraid I am different, and I am terrified that I am just like everyone else.