My Narconon Experience
by Colin Henderson, August 2007
Part 1: Walking Through the Haze
Hi, my name is Colin Henderson and I recently checked myself into the Narconon Arrowhead program. I checked myself in on July 18, 2007 and checked myself out on August 1, 2007. Later on in this document I will be going into very vivid details about my personal experiences while at Narconon Arrowhead, but first I would like to explain how I came to the decision that Narconon would be the right answer for me.
I have been a little depressed over the last few months because I realized that I had a drug problem. Finally, I came to grips with my problem on the evening of July 11, 2007. I got very real with myself. I asked myself “How can I expect to be successful in my family life and business, if I can’t achieve success in my own personal life?” This realization leads me to speak to one of my best friends step mother, who is a drug counselor. I went over to her house on July 12, 2007, and we discussed some different treatment programs. I remember telling her that my spirit has become clouded and her reply was that my genuine spirit has been over taken by a drug addict. I had never thought of it like that. I had been using drugs since 1992. I had been using so long that I had no idea what my genuine spirit was, but I did know a few things about myself. One being, that I am a very caring person. I also knew that I was a very strong minded and a determined man. I also am a firm believer in the Golden Rule, “Do unto others, as you would have others do onto you”. And finally, I believe in God, His son Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost.
I started to look into a few places around the country. I started with the 12 step places, but I didn’t like the fact that someone was going to tell me that I am a drug addict for the rest of my life. So, on July 14, 2007 I found Narconon Arrowhead on the internet. I read their entire website and then made a phone call to them. The first person that I talked to was Paul Wise. He was very nice to me. I asked him to put a package together and send it out ASAP. In the mean time I started to receive calls from John Shaffer, one of their headhunters. I will be going into more detail regarding the conversations that I had with John Shaffer in the next paragraph. I received the package on July 16, 2007. I opened the package to find a DVD, brochure booklet, a small booklet about addiction, and a letter from Paul Wise. I read all the material and watched the DVD. I hadn’t made my decision yet; I had to get some very important questions answered before I made my decision.
After reviewing all the materials I called John Shaffer back. I had a few questions to be answered. One of the first questions that I asked was regarding my high blood pressure. I needed to make absolutely sure that there would be no problems in taking my BP medicine. I was told “there would be no problem at all, and to make sure and bring a 2 month supply of my medication”. I was relieved to hear this. I went to my Rx and ordered another month supply. I took a total of 68 Ziac pills with me. (If you’re not sure what this medication is, it is simply a water pill.) The next question I asked was; will I be able to bring my laptop. I was told “yes, you may use your laptop at your own leisure, but you wouldn’t be able to use it your room”. I thought this was great because I would be able to keep up with my business emails. My next question was not an important one. But I thought that I would ask it anyway. I knew there was a golf course near the Narconon Arrowhead facility. I asked if I would be able to go play a round of golf on the weekends. The answer to this question from John Shaffer was “hell ya, Bro, you can go and play on the weekends when ever you want”. I thought that was pretty cool, so I brought my clubs with me. The final question was the most important question of all, “John, I need to know without a shadow of doubt that Scientology is not being taught or practiced by Narconon”. The answer that I received by John Shaffer was “no Bro, we do not teach or practice Scientology”. Upon receiving these answers to my question I made my final decision, and that was that Narconon Arrowhead is the right answer for me.
Later in the day on July 16, 2007, I took the DVD with me to our family business. I handed my brothers the DVD and asked them to watch it, because this is where I would be for the next 2-2.5 months. I remember telling them that “I can’t live like this anymore and that I wanted to live life right”. I must say that every one of my friends and family members stood firmly behind me, and that all of their support and prayers, where and are unbelievable. After my family read some of the material and watched the DVD they all agreed that Narconon Arrowhead sounded life a great place. My older brother, Jeff made a phone call to Narconon Arrowhead in order to ask a few questions himself. I had no idea that he was calling them to ask the questions regarding certain aspects of Narconon. Before I left he did tell me that he spoke to Paul Wise, and that the main question that he needed to be clear on was the Scientology issue. Jeff was assured, just like I was that Narconon does not teach or practice Scientology to or on their students.
On July 18, 2007 my mom and I arrived at Narconon Arrowhead. We went in with John Shaffer into the Intake conference room. John asked several questions regarding my past drug use. I was completely honest with him and my mom. Then John started to send a lot of paperwork across the table requiring my signature. There were so many documents; it seemed as if I was buying another house. After we finished the paperwork and handed over the money we went out front to unload my bags and also to say goodbye to my mom. I was very concerned about her driving the 200 miles back home all by herself. I ask John if my mom could call him on his cell phone as soon as she arrived back home safely. John assured me that as soon as he received the phone call that he would get the message right to me in Withdraw. I was in the Withdraw phase for about 3 days. When I was moved to General Population, the first thing that I did was call my Mom to let here know that I was out of Withdraw and to ask her if she had forgotten to call John to let him know that she made it home safely so that John could get the message to me. Well, she did call, but she called Kyle, another headhunter that we had talked to the night before, by accident instead of calling John. Anyway the message never came to me. The first night out of Withdraw, we were out on the back patio and one of the Ethic guys, Scott who by the way was a very helpful individual to not only myself but other students, brought Kyle out back to see Joe. Joe, Dan and I were in withdraw together. Joe had a grievance with Kyle, his headhunter, about all the false promises that he and his family were told. While they were discussing the issue I informed Scott that the grievance I had made regarding the message from my mom was not fully correct, meaning I told Scott that my mom had accidentally called Kyle instead of calling John, but Kyle assured her that he would get the message to me. Again I never received that message. After I told this to Scott he said no problem that as soon as Joe and Kyle discussed their issues that I would get a chance to confront Kyle regarding this issue. I told Kyle who I was and that I believe he received a call from my mom in order to let me know that she had made it home safely. Kyle response was very cowardly, first of all his full attention went away from me and directly to Scott. Kyle wouldn’t even look me in my eyes, what a stand up guy. I am going to quote Kyle’s response to my statement “THAT WOMAN CALLED ME ON MY DAY OFF” the tone in his voice was completely a defensive tone. I will admit that it took everything I had to stay seated on that bench. I will not deny that the thought of putting my foot so far up his rear end so that he could taste the rubber soul from my shoe for the rest of his life, but I didn’t because I have very strong self control. Even though one might say, how can you say you have self control being a drug addict? Well it is very simple to answer that question, I never allowed myself to be out of control completely with drug abuse. I would never use during working hours, and I never allowed my addiction to grow, which means that I never up my dosages in order to get a better high only to be able to maintain and not get sick.
I am now going to go into some of the false promises that were made to me. The first being the laptop issue, I was told that I would be able to use my laptop whenever I need to, but not in my room. Well that wasn’t the case; you can only qualify to use a laptop if you are an on paper, an actual business owner. In my case we have a family business (T&S Printing Inc.), I myself am not on paper as of yet, so I had no right to be able to use my laptop. Now this didn’t bother me too much simply because I was there to work on myself and not business but, I sure didn’t enjoy being lied to. I believe that if you ask a question you should get a straight up answer, regardless what the question is. The second issue was the golfing on the weekends, when I was unloading my bags from my mom’s truck I decided not to unload my golf clubs because it just didn’t seem right. Like I said regarding the laptop, I was there to work on my self not my golf game. Come to find out you are not allowed to go to the golf course. You have to make what they call “up stat”, you make up stat by accumulating enough points through out the week, which really means you answer enough questions the way that they want you to answer the questions, the more you reform to their way of thinking the more points you will accumulate. You also make points by being to all of the roll calls and manning your assigned cleaning station. I believe this practice is very good for most addicts, because it teaches students responsibility.
The third false promise is regarding my blood pressure medication, I have started a new paragraph regarding this issue because there are a lot of points that I am going to make. I was in Withdraw for 3 days, my vitals were taken every 12 hours and I was staying in a pretty good range. I think the “Drug Bombs” and “Cal-Mag” that you have to take and drink helped me regarding my BP. Oh, I asked what was in the “Drug Bomb” but for some reason I couldn’t get a straight answer, imagine that. As for the “Cal-Mag” they told me it was Calcium, Magnesium, and Cider Vinegar. When I was released from Withdraw on the evening of July 20, 2007 I started to notice the feeling of my BP rising. I started to monitor my BP with the help of Vlad; he is the “Medical Examiner”. I meet Vlad in his office every morning and late afternoon to do a BP check. I asked several times if I could have my BP medication. But the answer that I keep getting is “you are just making your symptoms, just give the supplements time to work”. I am going to jump forward a little bit; on the morning of July 24, 2007 my BP was starting to cause me problems. On this morning it was running 200/97, you can imagine I wasn’t feeling good. I asked Vlad several times to give me my BP medication, but to no avail. I then took a different approach, I stopped asking for my medication and I started demanding my medication. I was told by Vlad that I would have to wait until Friday the 27th to talk to Dr. Wooten in order to be cleared to take my BP medication. I had a serious problem with this. Why does another doctor need to clear me on BP medication that I was ordered to take by my own personnel care doctor, Dr. Robert Jones? So anyway I have had enough, I told Vlad if you’re not going to give my BP medication I am either going to go through you or over you in order to get my BP medication. I had to go over Vlad, I walked down to MLO (Nurses Station), I asked the ladies if I could have my BP medication, they pulled my medical file only to find nothing in my folder saying that I have hypertension. (Now this didn’t surprise me.)
They also told me that I would have to wait until Friday, the 27th to see the doctor. Well now at this point I wasn’t going to take NO for an answer. It floored me on what I had to say in order to get my BP medication. I told them this “You will give me my BP medication or I will call my lawyer” needless to say they handed me one of my pills before I could even start the next sentence. After taking my medication I was informed that this should have never happened. (No kidding.) They are supposed to wing you off of your BP medication, because it takes about 2 weeks for the supplements to start to work in your body. They do this in order to prep you for the Sauna Program. Yes, this means you are not allowed to take your BP medication while in the Sauna because it may interfere with the Niacin that they pump into you. (This would have been great to know when I asked John Shaffer about my BP medication.) What concerns me the most regarding this issue is Narconon allowed this to become a physically dangerous situation just because no one there is on the same page. You can ask 3 departments the same questions, and you will get 3 completely different answers. I am just glad that I am not afraid to stand up for either, myself or others when something is not right. When something is not right it is simply that, NOT RIGHT.
After I cooled down a bit and went down to the receptionist’s desk in the front lobby. I told her that I wanted a confront with John Shaffer and Paul Wise. She told me they were in a meeting and that they could not be interrupted. This was the wrong answer. I said “I don’t care if they are in a meeting. Get them on the phone right now”. She said “It is not Narconon’s policy to interrupt internal meetings”. So I said “I don’t care what Narconon’s policy is, get them on the phone right now, because I can have anything I want”. That last part is something they teach people in Withdraw. They do this to boost the person’s self esteem, but I don’t completely agree with the method and here is why. They tell you “you can have anything you want; all you have to do is go and take it”. I agree with the first part, but not the latter. You can have anything you want, but you can’t go and just take it you have to earn it. If you just went and took something that is not yours that is know as stealing. The receptionist told me that I need to go down to PSS (Program Student Services) in order to get grievance forms. Before I headed down to PSS I stopped into my Book 1 course. I went in there to inform my instructor that I would not be back in class until my grievances have been addressed. I did need to vent a little bit so I figured that a great place to do this would be in my Book 1 course, so I let everyone in Book 1, to include fellow students and staffers know how I felt about the wrong doings that were going on at Narconon Arrowhead. I brought everything up except the Scientology teachings and practices; I decided to save that for another day. After venting I went down to PSS and made a formal complaint. I told them the same thing that I told my Book 1 course. Regarding the confront request, they said that Paul Wise would not come down to confront me. I asked them why and Sarie with PSS said, “Paul is a hot head and he tends to blow up during confronts”. I said “it sounds like your telling me that he is scared to confront me. (I thought that was one of the main purposes of this program, to help someone be comfortable enough with yourself in order to confront others on issues that need to be addressed”. But, apparently their own staffers and headhunters can’t practice what they preach. Imagine that.) Well since Paul Wise wouldn’t step up they told me that Johnny B. would accompany John Shaffer during this confront. Johnny B. was John Shaffer’s direct boss. I was satisfied with this. About 3 hours later John Shaffer finally came and found me, I noticed that he was by himself. He wanted to step outside and talk about this over a cigarette. I told him “that probably wouldn’t be the greatest idea for his sake, because I will not hold back, and that he wouldn’t want all the other students around to hear what I said to him”. He completely agreed with this so we went inside to a private conference room. As soon as we got into the room, we both sat down. He asked “what was going on, Bro”. I simply told him “We’re not going to move forward with this confront until all of my requirements are meet.” John was completely oblivious to the requirements that I made at PSS. I informed John of my requirements and I added one in there for him. I said “I have a personal tape recorder in security lockup, and I would like to use it during our confront”. I also informed him that all parties within the confront must consent to the recording. His reply to me was “Wow Bro, no one has ever requested the things that you are requesting”. Well that was the last time John Shaffer talked to me under his own will. I would like to add that I have never heard from or met Johnny B. to this day.
I decided to call my brother Jeff to inform him of what was going on at Narconon. He asked me if I wanted him to call. I told him “no, I would like to handle this myself”. It was several hours since he had heard from me so he called Jason in the finance, the next thing I know I have a knock at my room door. It is Jason. This is the first time that I met Jason. He handed me a message from Jeff. The message read call Jeff ASAP. I thanked Jason for getting the message to me so quickly. I went to call Jeff and he asked me if everything was OK. I told him that I was fine. He informed me that he had brought up all the grievances that I had with Jason. I do remember telling Jeff that,”these people have no idea who they are dealing with; they are now dealing with a Henderson with an extremely clear mind”. The people at Narconon are not used to dealing with someone that will stand up for ones self or others when they sense something is not right. They are so used to being able to control someone with in their mind in order to get them to reform to their practices. I am not one of those people. I came to Narconon to get off drugs, not to have Narconon attempt to re-wire my brain in order to reform to their way of thought. I have a very strong mind. I will never allow anyone to attempt to control my mind. I think for myself, I have a great set of morals instilled in me by my mom, and I will fight someone tooth and nail if they try to take that from me, it will never happen. This is who I am.
Later on that evening I passed Jason from finance in one of the halls. I asked him if I could talk to him for a minute. We went into his office; I said to him “I am starting to sense that there are Scientology practices and underlying teachings going on at Narconon.” His response to that was “Praise Jesus, Praise Jesus my Lord and Savior”. I thought that was an extremely strong response to my statement. With his response to come so quick, it seemed like it was a programmed response to my statement, I am sure it wasn’t the first time Jason had to respond to a statement like that. Jason said “I went through the program and it helped me tremendously in life, and no matter what the technology is based off of no one could take my beliefs away from me”. Now, I completely agree with Jason, but for him to say what he did pretty much proved to me that there are Scientology practices and underlying teachings going at Narconon. I will be going into much more detail regarding the Scientology aspects at Narconon a little bit later in this document.
The next day, July 25, 2007, I went back to my Book 1 course. It sure didn’t take long for Student Patrol to come and get me to go see Janet. Janet is the overall Course Supervisor. She wanted to make sure that all my grievances were resolved. I told her “No they were not”, I still have not had my confront with John Shaffer and Johnny B. She then told me that the issues regarding my confront request had already been taken care of. I couldn’t believe that these people at Narconon were now afraid of me. Janet wanted to discuss the laptop issue. I told her it is very simple. That laptop was now a dead resource and that it needed to be shipped back to our office at Narconon's expense with $2,500 in insurance against the package”. She assured me that she would get with Jason to see if that could be arranged. I told her “I would expect to have an answer within 24 hours”. She then asked me “If I was having anymore problems getting my BP medication”. I said “no I wasn’t, I go down to MLO every morning to get my medication and a BP check”. I then decided to see what her response would be to the Scientology statement that I made to Jason. Her response was to stumble on her words a little, break eye contact and blink vigorously. She said “There are no Scientology practices or teachings going on at Narconon. It was only L. Ron Hubbard’s technologies being taught”. In other words this is all about Scientology. I could tell it was becoming very hard for Janet to maintain solid eye contact through out the rest of our conversation. I understand why. It is not human nature to look someone in the eye while you’re lying to them. The next morning before the 9:00am roll call I stopped in Janet’s office. I asked her “about arrangements to ship my laptop”. Janet told me she had gotten with Jason and that it was being arranged. Mind you this was Wednesday July 25, 2007; I was at Narconon for one more week I left on Wednesday August 1, 2007. There were never any steps made to ship the laptop out, just another lie to keep me quiet. It didn’t work, I played their game for the next 6 days until David a Word Clear made things perfectly clear on what was being taught and practiced.
Ok, now I am going to go into the Scientology teachings and practices that Narconon practices. I would like to start by saying “I will not degrade ones religious beliefs”. If Scientology is helping people to lead healthy productive lives then that is great. What I don’t agree with is teaching or practicing Scientology on someone with out their full knowledge of what is being taught and practice on them. Every new student at any Narconon facility has an extremely vulnerable mind. All of the students are some form of an addict. The scary thing is Narconon knows this. While I was in the program I heard the term Preclear, this term was never directed toward me, but I overheard staffers using this term regarding students. I have pulled the actual Scientology definition of this word:
Preclear: a spiritual being who is now on the road to becoming Clear, hence pre-Clear.
Another word that I heard a lot of was Clear.
Clear: the name of a state achieved through auditing or an individual who has achieved this state. A Clear is a being who no longer has his own reactive mind. A Clear is an unaberrated person and is rational in that he forms the best possible solutions he can on the data he has and from his viewpoint. The Clear has no engrams which can be restimulated to throw out the correctness of computation by entering hidden and false data.
Scientologists regard “acceptable truth” as ethical tactics. This statement made a lot of things very clear regarding Narconon. When John Shaffer answered my questions he was, with out a doubt practicing “acceptable truths”. Narconon aka Scientology believes this, it is a good ethical tactic to tell someone an “acceptable truth” as long as they have a good reason behind it. I, as a Christian, view this as justifying a reason to tell a lie. Any half truth only equals a complete lie. Narconon’s theory on requiting students is this. Just get the person here, once they are here, their here. I believe that practice is just wrong, if someone is asking questions regarding the program, either for themselves or for a loved one Narconon should be forthcoming to everyone on what the program is practicing and teaching. I don’t understand how it can be legal to deceive the public in order to get them or their loved one there. To me this is false advertising, and I
believe this practice of false advertisement to be illegal. One other thing I would like to say before I go into my TR0 experience is this, I firmly believe in The Bill Of Rights.
THE BILL OF RIGHTS
Amendments 1 of the Constitution
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.
I respect one and all’s freedom of Religion, but I will not stand by and do nothing when ones religious beliefs and practices are being forced upon someone without ones consent or knowledge of what is being practiced upon them. My belief in this matter applies to all religions.
Before I start to explain in detail of my experience during the TR 0 (Therapeutic Training Routines), I would like to explain all of Book 1 exercises.
* This course extroverts the individual and gets him/her into better communication with others and with the environment around him/her. This is accomplished through a series of simple Training Routines (TRs). Each TR is a specific drill (exercise) on one part of communication. Together, the TRs show how to get oneself understood and how to communicate better with others.
[Pamphlet issued by Narconon Chilocco, Oklahoma c. 1992]
* The course involves a rigid series of training routines termed TR's sub numbered 0-9. Each TR is an individually prescribed entity which must be mastered before proceeding on an upward "gradient" to the next TR. TR0 involves three exercises specified as "eyes closed," "eyes opened," and "bull baiting." The premise seems to involve the exercise of trust in "eyes closed," the exercise of direct eye contact tolerance (staring into the coach's eyes) in "eyes open," and the seeking of an emotional weak spot or "button" and a corresponding emotional response to it in the bull baiting routine. The bull baiting exercise seems to involve principally physical characteristics that may be used to embarrass or humiliate an individual and condition him to accept and control his responses to these verbal threats to his body image. For example, one might poke fun at a poor complexion, a crooked nose, and etc ...
TR1 through 9 involves mastering written course materials ... [primarily] involving the "proper" understanding of key words and phrases that must be looked up in the Narconon dictionary and then demonstrated in each exercise routine. TR1 teaches students to "clearly communicate"; TR2 -- how to "acknowledge" properly; TR3 -- how to get an answer to a question without "variation"' and TR4 -- how to handle "origination" -- to accept a pain or discomfort and find out where it originated.
* The first five TR's (0-4) must be mastered in their entirety three times before proceeding to TR6. (We were informed that no TR5 existed [see note below].) TR6 involves "good and effective control over an individual or group". TR7 --the same as TR6 but on a higher "gradient" which presumably means physical control over a threatening or disturbed individual. TR8 involves "intention without reservation" - to totally clarify ones intentions (which may be nonverbal). TR9 is a culmination of previous TR's and stresses particularly the thorough mastery of four conceptions, i.e. "exact intention," "exact strength needed," "exact force necessary," and "exact intention without reservation or limit.”
*The source of the this material is http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~dst/Narconon/trs.htm
When I was going through the TR 0 Eyes Open some very strange things started to happen to me. On July 30, 2007 I was doing a 30 minute TR 0 eyes open with my “twin”. I will try to explain this best that I can. I was looking into her eyes and everything including my twin faded away, my twin’s eyes and only her eyes came into focus along with a pale green haze everywhere. I had an extremely severe headache set in. I then jumped to my feet and grabbed my head, I also thought that we had been sitting there for only about 5 minutes, but come to find out we were in session for 27 minutes. The instructor came over to me ask if I was ok, I told her what had happened. She then started to explain to me what I just experienced, all that she told me is “you just seen her aura”. She could not explain why my head was hurting so bad. She sent me down to see Vlad in order to get more vitamins. I went back to Book 1 the next morning and the instructor told me that I needed to do a 40 minute TR0 eyes open session. She got a couple of other students to sit with me through my session. After we started the session it sure didn’t take long for weird things to start happening again. This time I remember everything fading to black except my twins face, and only his face. His face became one of the clearest things that I have ever seen in my life, it was is if his face was 2-3 inches from mine, but it didn’t bother me because I was in a completely calm state. We continued through the session, I don’t remember too much after that, but I do remember the Instructor tapping me on the shoulder saying “that’s it”. When I stood up I realized that my twin was someone else, I don’t remember them changing positions at all, one thing I knew for sure is that I had another severe headache. The headaches only lasted about 15 minutes and then they subsided, I was then more relaxed than I have ever been in my life. After these things were happening to me I asked the Instructor “what is going on, and why am I getting these headaches”. She could not answer these questions, but she did say that after break she was going to get me with a Word Clear. After break I sat down with David, a “Word Clear”. I would like to say that David was one of the nicest and most forthcoming people that I meet there.
David and I sat down together for about 5 hours. He was asking several questions regarding the experiences I had during the TR0 eyes open session. I told him exactly what I just told you. David couldn’t outright give me the answers to the questions that I was asking, but he did show me where to find the answers. When I kept asking “what just happened to me” he told me to go outside have a cigarette, because he needed about 10 minutes to get his materials together, so I complied to his request.
After about 10 minutes we were sitting back down at his desk, and he had a little red book with him. He opened the book and pointed out a word to me and asked me to read the definition. The word was thetan: the person himself-not his body or his name, the physical universe, his mind, or anything else; that which is aware of being aware; the identity which is the individual. David told me that I just had my first encounter with my thetan. I had never heard of this word before, because it is a word only used by Scientology. David continued to ask me a number of questions, so I humbled him by answering them truthfully, even though I was not interested in his explanations anymore. David did tell me something that I didn’t agree with and that was, he believes that his body is his spirit, and that when he dies his Spirit will be re-incarnated into something else. Well, after hearing what he just told me I felt compelled to tell him what I believe, that is, pointing to my body is only a vessel for my Spirit. And when I die my Spirit leaves the vessel and goes home, my body is exactly that a body. I thought it was a very good exchange of beliefs between two intelligent people. I must say that I thoroughly enjoyed my conversation with David. He was the only person at Narconon that I talked to that was a stand up person, his beliefs are his beliefs, and to me that is a very respectable aspect to David’s personality.
Later on that evening someone on the patio, (I don’t want to say his name) told me to check out Narconon Exposed web site. Of course, I had no means of checking this out for my self, so I called my mom and one of my brothers. The next day, August 1, 2007, around 11:30am I called my brother. He was in the process of reading a lot of info regarding what is going on inside of Narconon. I remember him telling me “I want you out of there ASAP” I told him this “you have to understand something; I am doing this for my self and nobody else. The decision to leave this program is my decision and nobody else’s”. He did inform me of the dangers regarding the New Life Detoxification Program aka Sauna. The dangers were regarding the amount of vitamins and Niacin that they pump into you. The levels are very scary. *Please refer to the Detox Dosages PDF file for details. At 12:30pm on August 1, 2007 I made my decision to leave. I called my mom to tell her to come and pick me up. When I got her on the phone and asked her to come and get me she said “I am already on my way”. She had read some of the web sites, but mainly the levels of vitamins, minerals and oils is what made her be extremely worried for my physical well being. After we finished our phone conversation I went down to PSS to request a routing form. I talked to Sarie in PSS. I asked her for a routing from. She asked why. I told her that I was leaving for good. The funny thing is they didn’t want me to fill it out; they wanted to fill it out themselves. After talking to Sarie I went to my room so I could pack up my things. About 3 hours later Student Patrol came looking for me. They told me that Whitney, the Family Counselor would like to talk to me. When I arrived at her office, (If you want to call it an office) I told her “Well, it’s finally good to meet the person that has been talking to my family” she had no reply to that. I then asked her “Why is that I finally get to meet you only after I have decided to leave this program?” (Still no solid response.) I must tell you that Whitney had told my Mom, Dad, and Brothers that she was keeping a close eye on me and my progress, then why is it I only meet here on the day that I was leaving. Well I tell you, her job is to try her hardest to get me to stay in the program. I told Whitney “Save your breathe, there is nothing you can say to me in order to change my mind. My mind is made up and no one will change it.” I also brought up the Scientology issue with her. I got the same answer that I had gotten before “There are no Scientology practices or teachings going on here, only L. Ron Hubbard’s technologies are being taught.” In response to that I decided to use an analogy that I was told by my brother. I said “Whitney, lets say you are back in my home town and you are back on drugs. I would tell you I can help you only if you are willing to help yourself, you say yes I do want to help myself. I say great lets go, I am going to lock you up in my seller, I will pump you full of vitamins and minerals, I will also make sure you are fed extremely well, I will allow you to get through the withdraw process. Once you are trough the withdraw phase I will open a pipe into your brain. I will tell you, “Whitney, you feel better today. Do you know why? Because the sky is blue and the grass is green. I will tell you this about a hundred times a day, if your asleep I will wake you up just to tell this to you. After a little time you will start to believe this, and you think you are healed. This is a brain washing technique, the exact same technique being used by Narconon.” Whitney had absolutely no response to this. The only thing she could say was “I have never heard of anything like that”. Well, that was that for that conversation. I have officially had enough. When my mom arrived they took us back to Whitney so that she could talk to my mom. My mom brought up some of the exact same issues I did; I thought that was so cool. The next thing that happened is this guy named Jason, I have no idea what his official title is, but he made it very clear that he was their (Narconon Arrowheads) heavy hitter. I thought it was a little strange that he wouldn’t even acknowledge me, his full intention and attention was on my mom. I let their conversation go a little bit until I heard and seen him attempting to control her during the conversation. Mom was trying to interject a few things to him, but he would not allow her to, so I stepped in. I told him “Jason, if my mom wishes to interject something to you, you will allow her to interject.” Jason’s tone started to change a lot; I could see that he realized he could not control me or my mom, because I wouldn’t let him. I started to really jump into the conversation with Jason; I used a couple of their practices on him. We were not getting a straight answer regarding all the false promises that were made to me, he started to break eye contact, started to talk with is hands, and his face started to turn a little red. I stuck with the same question regarding the false promises until he reacted to that button; his final response was “I GOT THAT!!!” Man let me tell you that was priceless. Jason made it perfectly clear that he knew nothing of my case. He had no clue that I brought my self there, my Mom didn’t make me go there. There was only one motive for me being there and that motive was I was doing this for myself. Before Jason left us I told him that I wanted copies of every piece of paper that I signed. His response was “Ya, no problem” well he handed my folder back to Sarie with PSS, while we were at the Treasury office I asked Sarie about the paperwork that I requested from Jason, this was the first time she had heard anything about this request, but for some reason I was not at all surprised that Jason didn’t pass my request to her. Sarie told us that we would have to get a hold of Craig Silver (Narconon Arrowhead Attorney) in order to obtain all the documents that I signed. About 30 minutes later mom and I were on the road to home. Just one more little thing on August 2, 2007 I called Craig Silver and left a message for him to call me back at my mom house. Later that day he did call back, I was not there to take the phone call, but mom was. Mom told me that he was going to send all medical and intake forms to her address. I was a little surprised to see all of my requested documents arrive on the following Saturday. Thank you Craig for following through with my request. Narconon could use a few more people like yourself.
There is always good in every situation, no matter how bad the situation. I believe that God lead me to Narconon so that I can help my fellow man. I have written a testimonial on the next page of this letter.
Part 2: Walking Above the Haze
I would like to say that there is something that I couldn’t obtain by myself, and that Narconon did help me to obtain, that is my sobriety. While I was there it was awesome to be around other students. All of us could talk so freely with one another. Yes, some are there not for themselves but for others and very few are there for themselves, but it doesn’t matter we are all there fighting the same fight. The relationships established there or at any treatment program will last a life time. I remember talking to Paul, a friend in my Book 1 course about why we started to use drugs. I had never thought about that before. I answered him on that question the next day, Paul also helped me to understand that no matter how good of person I thought I was during my drug addicted years, I have hurt everyone that loves and cares about me, only by hurting myself. Thank you Paul for helping me understand this. Paul also told me something else, about an hour before I left, we sat down and talked. He said something that blew me away. We were talking about always trying to live by the golden rule, He said “maybe people like you and me should change that statement a little to, “Do unto ourselves, as we do unto others.” Thanks again Paul for your words of wisdom, I tell myself that everyday. Be Strong Brother.
I would like for someone to read this letter and possibly answer a few questions. How can an organization like Narconon be allowed to do what they are doing to people? How can imposing ones religious practices and teachings on ones mind without their consent or knowledge of what is being taught to them be legal in America? How can feeding acceptable truths to people that are seeking help either for themselves or their loved ones be legal? How can making someone take extreme amounts of vitamins and minerals, even when that someone ask why and is it dangerous to take those extreme amounts, only to get a answer of you have to take or you will not move forward in the program, how can this be legal? How can Narconon not allow you to take your doctor prescribed medication for hypertension until you get cleared by their Doctor to take you own medication, how can this be legal? How can Narconon teach people how to
control other people and objects with verbal commands and if that does not accomplish your objective then you are laterally to become physical with that person or object, how is this legal? How can Narconon teach people to degrade other human beings in some of the worst ways, how can this be legal? How can Narconon say that this is not Scientology when the Training Routines practiced by Narconon are the exact same Training Routines practiced by Scientology workshops around the world? How can Narconon have their own definitions to words, and those definitions are all to be found in the Scientology dictionary, but they don’t teach or practice Scientology, how can that be? I am sure there are a lot more questions out there; please do not be afraid to ask the hard questions regarding any situation that you sense is wrong. And please don’t hesitate to stand up for what is right and fight the good fight, not just for yourselves but more importantly for the sake of your fellow man.
I promise this letter is almost done. I just have one more thing to say. I believe that there are a few things that each and every one of us has, these are very simple things, but very strong things. These are our morals, values, principles, and your integrity. When organizations like Narconon try to re-write your morals, values, and principles you must use your integrity to fight them tooth and nail. We all have morals, values, and principles instilled in us at a very young age. Our integrity is something that we develop through out our lives. No one can take you integrity from you; you can only give up your integrity. You can be pushed very hard by people or events in your life, but no matter how tough it gets you must use your integrity to fight the good fight. If you fight hard enough those people or events will realize that they can’t break you. Just like our forefathers always said “Stay the Course”. We as Americans have the strongest resolve of any other societies on the face of the earth. There is only one other person that has an unwavering resolve stronger than ours and that is God himself and his Son Jesus Christ.
I believe that God laid out a path for me when I came into this world. I am 100% sure that God places times of trials and tribulations on my path, so that they will make me a stronger man. I know I was meant to walk through the dark valley of drug addiction in order for me to take myself to Narconon Arrowhead in order to see what is being done to my fellow man. I will not stand for someone or some organization imposing their way of thought and beliefs on others, God won’t let me. I never really knew what I was supposed to do with my life, now I do. I am to help others to stay away from drugs with proper education, and to help expose Narconon and their immoral ways.
“Life is not a race”
“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but the Devil never will”
Thank you for your time,