Words: Bridget Spitznagel
Music: The Masochism Tango, Tom Lehrer
My head aches from last night's libation But much more from the sight of notation You wield that big O like no one I know As we dance to the algorithms tango Let the math obfuscate, not enlighten; Use new symbols in order to frighten. Dash through a proof mere mortals would goof As we dance to the algorithms tango Assignment One Is really lots of fun Too bad I'm still not done In time to hand it in. But proving P Is equal to NP Could earn me a degree -- Hey, why your evil grin? Your amortizations of splay trees Are why I long to be your advisee Some say I'm insane, but I love the arcane, And the legerdemain of your tango. On the first day of class, you four-colored a map, and You packed spheres in my lap, and Then I couldn't take notes. How I envy the chalk that you dug from your pocket Saying "This isn't rocket Science" (such witty quotes!) Union-find and the Ackermann inverse, "Exercise left for reader", please, be terse, When I don't understand, it all seems so grand As we dance to the algorithms tango.
Disclaimer: No resemblance to persons living, dead, or otherwise is intended; "algorithms" just plain scanned right.
Background: One of the courses that CMU CS graduate students are required to take is the algorithms core course. It has useful content, but is far from easy; in fact, study groups are recommended.
Legal frufru: Lyrics © 1996, Bridget Spitznagel. Permission granted for private noncommercial use and reproduction of these lyrics, provided that this copyright notice remains intact. Other uses are negotiable.