THE VATICAN RAG
		 by Tom Lehrer
		 
	[--Moderately bright--]

	First you get down on your knees,
	Fiddle with your rosaries,
	Bow your head with great respect,
	and
	Genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!
	
	Do whatever steps you want if
	You have cleared them with the Pontiff,
	Everybody say his own
	Kyrie eleison,
	Doin' the Vatican Rag!
	
	[--jaunty piano solo--]
	
	Get in line in that processional,
	Step into that small confessional,
	There the guy who's got religion'll
	Tell you if your sin's original.

	If it is, try playing it safer,
	Drink the wine and chew the wafer,
	Two, four, six, eight,
	Time to transubstantiate!

	So, get down upon your knees,
	Fiddle with your rosaries,
	Bow your head with great respect,
	and
	Genuflect, genuflect, genuflect!
	
	Make a cross on your abdomen,
	When in Rome, do like a Roman,
	Ave Maria!
	(Gee, it's good to see ya!)
	Getting ecstatic an'
	sort of dramatic an'
	Doin' the Vatican Rag!